When I was in graduate school one of my first clients was a woman who came in to talk about her depression. At her second session she confided that she was worried about her 3 year old son who was belligerent and often banged his head when he was frustrated. At the time I didn't really know what to make of it and I suggested that she take him to his pediatrician to be assessed for autism.
Because I was only a student therapist and she only had a few sessions with me, I never learned the outcome of her son's doctor visit.
If she were to come to see me now I would do things differently. I would have her bring her son in to be assessed for depression. We now know that depression can have strong familial and genetic ties. We also know that even very little children can suffer with depression. But because children are not verbally or emotionally sophisticated they show symptoms of depression in very different ways from adults. Both parents and pediatricians can miss the child's cries for help.
Children, even infants, have feelings of anger, frustration, stress and depression. But they don't know how to adequately communicate their feelings. Consequently their frustration and anxiety increases even further and they degenerate into an emotional heap; throwing a tantrum, screaming, hitting themselves in the head and throwing themselves onto the floor.
Parents become perplexed and worry that their child may be turning into a brat. Not so. Just as with adults, depression in children causes them to feel unheard, unloved and unworthy of love. The emotional pain of feeling unlovable is so great that they distract themselves from their emotional pain by focusing on creating physical pain.
If the child's depression and feelings of worthlessness go unchecked they may grow into teens and adults who begin cutting themselves, getting involved in masochistic sexual relationships or taking drugs, attempting to use physical pain as a distraction from their intense emotional pain.
If you have a child or infant who is frequently tantruming, banging their head, hitting themselves or otherwise causing themselves physical pain, take them to see a clinical psychologist who is well versed in childhood depression, to be assessed. Even if your family dynamics are such that they are contributing to the child's unhappy behavior, it is important to learn if there is a genetic component as well.
Don't be too quick to label your child belligerent or bratty. Punishing this behavior only validates the child's feelings of worthlessness and increases their anger and frustration. Depression isn't a choice. However you, the parent, can choose to help your suffering child.
Showing posts with label cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Show all posts
Tuesday
Consumer Beware - Therapy for Therapists
Human beings have a tendency to stereotype and compartmentalize others. This is especially true for those in our culture that hold positions of authority such as doctors, clergy and police officers. We see them functioning in their profession and tend to forget that they are just people like us with families, problems and failings. This fact is particularly true for those who work in the mental health field.
This fact in of itself isn't a problem. The problem arises when those wishing to become therapists, counselors and psychologists are doing so as a way to elevate themselves in the eyes of others, and to mask their deep seated insecurities and lack of self-love behind a diploma. Somewhere inside they know that they need therapy themselves, but they are afraid to do the painful work of self introspection that therapy provides and that healing requires. So they get a degree in psychology instead. They may believe that having an education will eliminate their need for therapy - not so.
Without proper help, the educated, unhealed therapist attempts to convince themselves and others that their profession defines them. People look to them for answers in their own life expecting that the therapists' advice will be based on having gained mastery over their own emotional, marital and childhood difficulties. The unhealed therapist is perpetuating a lie and fraudulently takes money without the ability to sufficiently help others.
A therapist cannot lift a client higher than where they themselves are standing. Consequently it is imperative that each therapist be willing to do their own work before attempting to help others. To deny themselves of this is to live life as a fraud.
As a consumer, it is vital that you understand that about 50% of all therapists should be on the couch rather than behind it. Never assume that your therapist has all the answers. And realize that you may have to visit several therapists before you find one that is mentally healthy enough to lift you up to where you want to be.
This fact in of itself isn't a problem. The problem arises when those wishing to become therapists, counselors and psychologists are doing so as a way to elevate themselves in the eyes of others, and to mask their deep seated insecurities and lack of self-love behind a diploma. Somewhere inside they know that they need therapy themselves, but they are afraid to do the painful work of self introspection that therapy provides and that healing requires. So they get a degree in psychology instead. They may believe that having an education will eliminate their need for therapy - not so.
Without proper help, the educated, unhealed therapist attempts to convince themselves and others that their profession defines them. People look to them for answers in their own life expecting that the therapists' advice will be based on having gained mastery over their own emotional, marital and childhood difficulties. The unhealed therapist is perpetuating a lie and fraudulently takes money without the ability to sufficiently help others.
A therapist cannot lift a client higher than where they themselves are standing. Consequently it is imperative that each therapist be willing to do their own work before attempting to help others. To deny themselves of this is to live life as a fraud.
As a consumer, it is vital that you understand that about 50% of all therapists should be on the couch rather than behind it. Never assume that your therapist has all the answers. And realize that you may have to visit several therapists before you find one that is mentally healthy enough to lift you up to where you want to be.
Thursday
What is Cognative Behavioral Therapy?
I am a proponent of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy or CBT, and I am often asked to explain what that means. Although it is difficult to do it in four paragraphs or less let me give it a shot.
CBT is effective because it teaches the client to modify patterns of thinking which affect behavior. CBT is a straight-forward therapy which is designed to alert the client to self-defeating ways of thinking. This type of therapy focuses on the client's negative self-talk, and offers practical suggestions on how to re frame one's thinking to make it more adaptive. The CBT therapist assists the client in thinking more rationally by examining the individuals nonsensical thoughts, observing ways in which they may distort reality, and reducing the amount of assumptions or beliefs that negatively affect their ways of thinking and behaving.
Homework is an integral part of therapy, patients will be encouraged to complete exercises designed to change negative thinking. A typical assignment is to help the client to identify current troubling events, negative self-talk, and ways of rationally responding to situations sited. Then, during the week, the client journals about difficult situations, identifies self-defeating thinking and refutes the negative thought processes with more rationally adaptive way of responding to events. The journal is often reviewed in the next session.
With CBT, clients are in control of their own progress. They are aware of the process that is necessary for change, and diligently work at modifying faulty thought patterns. Therapeutic progress is easily monitored through self-inventories and patient feedback.
Individuals with anxiety, addictive patterns and depressive disorders are particularly well suited to benefiting from this from of treatment. The good news is that many behavioral health disorders can be treated successfully through cognitive-behavioral therapy. NACBT or The National Association of Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy is a good resource for locating counselors who are sufficiently trained, certified, and specialize in this treatment approach.
CBT is effective because it teaches the client to modify patterns of thinking which affect behavior. CBT is a straight-forward therapy which is designed to alert the client to self-defeating ways of thinking. This type of therapy focuses on the client's negative self-talk, and offers practical suggestions on how to re frame one's thinking to make it more adaptive. The CBT therapist assists the client in thinking more rationally by examining the individuals nonsensical thoughts, observing ways in which they may distort reality, and reducing the amount of assumptions or beliefs that negatively affect their ways of thinking and behaving.
Homework is an integral part of therapy, patients will be encouraged to complete exercises designed to change negative thinking. A typical assignment is to help the client to identify current troubling events, negative self-talk, and ways of rationally responding to situations sited. Then, during the week, the client journals about difficult situations, identifies self-defeating thinking and refutes the negative thought processes with more rationally adaptive way of responding to events. The journal is often reviewed in the next session.
With CBT, clients are in control of their own progress. They are aware of the process that is necessary for change, and diligently work at modifying faulty thought patterns. Therapeutic progress is easily monitored through self-inventories and patient feedback.
Individuals with anxiety, addictive patterns and depressive disorders are particularly well suited to benefiting from this from of treatment. The good news is that many behavioral health disorders can be treated successfully through cognitive-behavioral therapy. NACBT or The National Association of Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy is a good resource for locating counselors who are sufficiently trained, certified, and specialize in this treatment approach.
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