Psych-Net Mental Health

Communication with a Smile

2011-07-18T06:17:00.000-07:00

With all the talking we do everyday one might think that using words would be a refined and easy form of communication. No so. Even those of us who teach others how to communicate effectively can slip into old habits when upset or when caught off guard. So here are a couple of reminders to help you get through your next complicated communication scenario without making matters worse.

Remember to use "I statements" and express your actual thoughts and feelings instead of negating or criticizing another persons opinion. For instants If someone mentions that something is cute and you don't agree, own your opinion by using the word "I" to express how you feel. For example: "Hmmm, I don't think its all that cute. It's just not my style"

This way you are not criticizing the other persons' opinion, you are just disagreeing with them. If however you respond by saying "No it's not, it's ugly." you are in effect arrogantly telling the other person that they are wrong and you are right, you are criticizing them and their opinion and you are igniting a potential argument. In short you are taking a simple difference of opinion and turning it into a negative and hurtful verbal exchange.

Words are a tricky form of communication, and unless we grew up in a home where healthy communication was the norm it can take a great deal of effort to learn how to express our needs clearly, to listen without judgment and to express our differences without creating hurt feelings. However, making the effort can mean the difference in maintaining happy, healthy relationships.

Living With the Loss of a Loved One

2011-01-28T03:21:00.000-08:00

More people die during the winter months than at any other time of year. Those of us who are left behind often find ourselves feeling the sting associated with grief as the anniversary of a loved one's passing rolls around.

It is common for people to feel depressed, irritable or to develop flu-like symptoms around the anniversary of a loved one's death. It isn't necessary to be conscious of the anniversary to develop the symptoms of grief; our mind and our body have great memories, and if we have not allowed ourselves to fully mourn our loss, our body can re-experience our unresolved feelings, turning them inward and creating havoc in our life.

In the aftermath of a traumatic or untimely death survivors may feel what is known as "Survivor's Guilt." Around the anniversary of your loss you may experience nightmares or fear that you too will die young or suffer a tragic accident. Unresolved grief can create devastating consequences including ill health or thoughts of suicide.

Allan N. Schwartz, LCSW, Ph.D. of Boulder, Colorado states that "unrealistic and unresolved guilt or grief reactions can lead to illness or death at or just before the anniversary of the death of a spouse, mother, father or child." Clearly the grieving process is not only necessary for optimum mental health but also for one's physical health.

So if your mood or behavior seems out of sync, search your memory to see if you may be experiencing anniversary related grief. Be kind to yourself, it can take 6 months to 2 years to fully grieve the loss of a loved one. But if you haven't worked through your feelings of denial, anger, bartering, depression and acceptance (as outlined by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross) you can experience the effects of anniversary grief for decades.

Begin by acknowledging what you are feeling and experiencing, then look for opportunities to talk about your memories with a trusted friend. Start a journal and record your thoughts and how they relate to your loss. Visit the grave and have a candid talk with your loved one or write down what you would say to them if you could see them one last time.

If you have troubled memories or feelings acknowledge them. Idealizing those who have passed is neither honest nor helpful. Be willing to entertain all your feelings, even those that aren't pretty, being careful not to get stuck in your negativity.

You will know you have completed your grieving process when the anniversary comes and goes without incident, or when you can share memories with minimal emotion. Some say that time heals all wounds, but unless you are an active participant in your grieving process it may take the rest of your life.

Reducing Stress and Taking Control of your Life

2010-12-11T03:23:00.000-08:00

So its official, you are feeling stressed, now what? Whether you are feeling momentarily overwhelmed or if you are prone to stress related panic attacks you can take control of your state of mind by learning and utilizing a few simple procedures. One of the quickest and most effective ways to reduce stress, curtail a panic attack or just to relax for the night is breathing exercises.

Practicing a deep breathing exercise can be both calming and energizing. Reducing your level of stress via controlled breathing has been shone to clear confusion, induce healthy sleep and even aid in the digestive process. It’s easy and you can do it nearly anywhere at any time. This exercise is the best and easiest tool I know for managing stress.

1. Sit up straight or lie flat on something firm but comfortable.
2. Slowly exhale through your mouth for a count of eight, making sure to empty both your upper lung (shoulder area) and your lower lung (stomach area).
3. Close your mouth and inhale through your nose to a count of eight, refilling both your upper and lower lung.
4. Hold your breath for a count of six.
5. Exhale again through your mouth to a count of eight.
6. Repeat three times.

Practice this breathing exercise twice a day. You can repeat the whole sequence whenever you begin to feel overwhelmed, but don't do more than four breaths at one time. Slowing down your breathing will help keep you from hyperventilating but be aware of your body and stop if you begin to feel light headed.

1. Regular exercise is another great way to help reduce the build up of daily stress. A brisk walk for 15-20 minutes is sufficient. But if you can only do five minutes at a time start there. Work up to exercising for thirty minutes, five days a week. Biking, swimming, gardening, or whatever physical activity appeals to you is acceptable.

2. Try to get at least 20 minutes of sunshine a day. Try walking the dog or reading a book at the park to get some sun. Even on a cloudy day the sun's uplifting rays can decrease your stress level.

3. Decrease the amount of caffeine you take in each day. Caffeine can make a stressful situation feel worse.

4. Time management is one of the best ways to decrease daily stress. If you can manage your time properly, you will eliminate the stress of worrying about being late or becoming stressed in traffic. Managing your time means being realistic about what you are actually able to do in a given period of time rather than what you think you ought to get done.

5. Do your best to get enough sleep and to maintain a regular sleep pattern. Most people need between 8-10 hours of good undisturbed sleep every night. Recent studies have shown that taking a 15-30 minute nap in the middle of the day reduces employee stress and improves productivity by as much as 25%. If you stay at home during the day take a nap when your children take theirs, instead of using that time to get more work done.

Attitude is half the battle. People who best deal with stressful situations are those who have a positive outlook on life, who are able to think realistically about the situation and attack a problem head on instead of going into denial or panic mode. For instance, if your child breaks a vase while playing indoors you can panic, get angry at the child or you can be grateful the child didn’t get hurt and recognize that everyone has accidents.

Your attitude and the way you decide to interpret stress can make an enormous difference in the way you cope with everyday events. Remember that you are ultimately in control, and by utilizing these simple steps you can change your life for good.

Should Depressed, or Obsessive Compulsive People Vote?

2008-10-29T00:40:00.000-07:00

Snippets from a University of Arkansas news release

Of the 50 states in our nation, 44 contain constitutional laws and statutes that bar individuals with emotional or cognitive impairment from voting," said Kay Schriner, research fellow at the Fulbright Institute of International Relations. "The only other group of Americans who face such disenfranchisement are convicted felons."

According to Schriner's research, the practice of revoking voting rights for people with mental disabilities began with the earliest state constitutions, drafted and ratified in the 1700s. Early American politicians felt that excluding "the idiot and insane" would ensure that the voting public consisted only of those capable of making informed and intelligent political decisions.

But as medical and social concepts of mental disability continued to evolve, these exclusionary laws were neither altered nor erased. In fact, states persisted in drafting and amending their constitutions to include such laws until as late as 1959.

As these issues come to light, it becomes increasingly important that people with disabilities -- both physical and mental -- be allowed to participate in the formation of policies that directly affect them.

Rather than making a blanket discrimination against people with mental illnesses, Schriner suggests that states conduct individual assessments of competency before banning a person from the election process. Yet even this can cause personal humiliation and could be viewed as a form of discrimination, Schriner said.

A better solution would be to throw out the disenfranchisement laws altogether and follow one simple rule: if a person can fill out a voting registration card, that person should then be considered competent to vote.

"Someone in an active psychotic state is not likely to sit down and register to vote or to visit their local polling place," said Schriner. "It's ridiculous even to worry about that, let alone write a law to prevent it."

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and Family

2008-05-22T00:45:00.000-07:00

I had a friend once who had intense, frequent thoughts of her own death. She imagined that she was going to be hit by a car. Although she was in therapy, she was not getting the help she needed, and before long she found it difficult to drive her car, fearing an accident. She so feared the power of her thoughts that she eventually became afraid to leave her home for fear of being hit by a car. She was 23, and the last time I heard from her, 10 years later, she was still housebound. To preserve her live she imprisoned herself in her home and stopped living.

Many people with Obsessive Compulsive disorder (OCD) have frequent thoughts of catastrophic death, either their own or that of their family members. The anxiety they feel when thoughts pop into their mind is so powerful that they can come to believe that their thoughts have the power to create the imagined catastrophe. To anyone else, that sounds downright crazy, but for the person experiencing the obsessive thought it seems very real.

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is a common topic on the talk show circuit, but what most people don't know is that most of us have some degree of obsessive and or compulsive tendencies. Obsessions are when you can't stop thinking about something, like worrying about whether or not you locked the door. Compulsions are when you feel compelled to do something, such as repeatedly checking to see if you really did lock the door.

Compulsive or obsessive tendencies don't become a problem unless they begin to verge on the irrational, or they begin to negatively impact your life or the life of those around you. For instance, you have to check the front door several times in order to feel secure, or you begin to feel anxious, worrying that the door might not have been locked properly. You might even return home prematurely in order to appease your anxiety.

One of the most devastating problems that results from a parent with irrational obsessions or compulsions is the negative impact it can have on the lives of their children. A parent that is overly afraid of germs, unhealthy foods or engaging in specific activities will inadvertently teach their children to fear the world.

I have seen children that were never allowed to jump on a trampoline or to stay overnight with a friend because of their parent's heightened anxiety and irrational fears. These children are being psychologically crippled by their neurotic parent. The fear based parent is forever changing who their child becomes, preventing them the freedom to explore the world around them or to live life to their fullest potential.

A parent terrified of their child being injured or dying may prevent them from swimming at the shore or bike riding with their friends. A parent who makes their child pay the price for their anxiety will unwittingly raise a child who reacts in one of two ways. Either the child will become rebellious, angry, and unable to discern between safe and unsafe activities. Or the child may adapt to the parent's neurotic control by learning to see the world through a filter of fear, creating emotional paralysis.

Living in a constant state of fear is a miserable, unhappy way to exist. But imposing our fears onto our innocent child is the saddest of all outcomes.

There is hope, but it requires the parent to choose the mental health of their child over their fears. Ask yourself, "Which do I love more, my child or my fear?"
It sounds harsh, but that is what it comes down to. Will you refuse treatment and choose instead to allow your irrational behaviors and thoughts to negatively impact your family, or do you choose to protect your child from psychological harm by getting help for yourself?

Facing your fear is nearly impossible without professional help. If it was easy you would have done it already. But addressing your fear is one of the quickest "fixes" in therapeutic terms. To help you with life immediately, a medication called an SSRI may be prescribed. But to get permanently past your obsessive-compulsive tendencies you will need the help of a skilled cognitive/behavioral therapist.

With professional help you will learn how to identify your irrational thoughts, how to replace them with rational thinking, and how to work through your fears. Unlike many types of therapy, this process can take as few as 6 sessions, and rarely more than 6 months.

Imagine your life becoming free from anxiety and fear in as little as 6 weeks to 6 months. Six months is going to come and go weather or not you get help. How do you want to be living six months from now? How important is it to you to protect your children from emotional harm? Bite the bullet. Get the help. Choose life!

Music Therapy and Depression

2008-03-14T04:34:00.000-07:00

By MedHeadlines

A recent review appearing in The Cochrane Library looked at five studies on music therapy and found that, though it shouldn’t be viewed as a stand-alone solution, music therapy may help ease depression.Three of the studies examined adults age 60 and older, one study adults between age 21 and 65, and one adolescents between 14 and 15. Four of the studies found that music therapy reduced the symptoms of depression. The fifth study found that it made no difference. However, the fifth study did not use a theory-based therapeutic technique. Lead author Anna Maratos said, “In the four studies where there was an impact, there was a very coherent theoretical framework, a very coherent explanation of what went on in the session and obvious reasons why the therapists were there. In the study that showed no effect, there didn’t seem to be any theoretical underpinning to the intervention. We have no idea why the therapist was there, really.”

“Music therapy” was defined as an intervention designed to improve health status that included musical interaction between therapist and patient within a structured theoretical framework and in which outcomes were born of music, talk inspired by music or therapeutic relationships.

Though no conclusive link was found between music therapy and an improvement in symptoms of depression, the positive correlation warrants a closer look. “It does make me wonder: What is standardized treatment [in music therapy]? There’s really a whole avenue of research that should be done,” said Shara Sand, Psy.D., clinical assistant professor of psychology at Yeshiva University.

Source: Health Behavior News Service

Narcissistic Personalities

2008-02-21T23:53:00.000-08:00

Q. Do Narcissists only love themselves?

Q. Do narcissists only love themselves?
A. Narcissists cannot love the way healthy people do. They profess love in order to be loved back. Narcissists are self centered and so they give only with the expectation of getting something in return. In a healthy relationship loving someone is not dependent upon emotional reciprocity. If your child disapoints you, you do not stop loving him, but the narcissist can hold life-long grudges when they feel slighted by another.

When the admiration begins to waine the narcissists "love" for that person stops as well. Narcissists love the reflection of themselves. In other words, they cannot formulate self love solely on who they are because inside they feel unloveable, so they project a self inflated image for others to see. They may flaunt intelligence, wealth, popularity etc.. When others buy into that projected image, and begin to reflect it back to the narcissist through admiration, awe, or clinging behavior the narcissist is able to love that reflected image of himself.

Q. Can the narcissist live a normal life?
A. Yes and no - what is normal? Narcissists seek after goals that are percieved as superior. They may believe that a higher education will make them important, or that attending a prestigeous university will give them an elevated status. If they haven't the means to reach their lofty goals they may engage in pathological lieing to create the image they believe will elevate their status to others.

The narcissist is the perverbvial name dropper. They derive immediate, but fleeting, self worth by associating themselves with others whom they percieve as superior. They may seek out interactions with those they admire as a way of associating themselves with those who emulate the image they desire. Being accepted into the circle of friendship boosts the narcissts self image and creates another opportunity to name drop at social functions.

Although the narcissist easily finds ways to talk about themselves and to flaunt their superior status, they seldom boast about their achievements directly. To maintain an image of super human ability they act as if their accomplishments were easily achieved. They may feel great shame admitting that they had to work hard to accomplish a goal.

Q. How can one recognize a narcissist?
A. Someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) has a pattern of grandiosity, a need for admiration, and lack of sincere empathy. Narcissists believe that the rules don't apply to them that they are above the law. Consequently they often disregard opinions and expectations from authority figures including police, doctors and those who don't agree with them. They may believe that they can safely drive while intoxicated or that they are intelligent enough to get away with a lie.

Narcissists need people in their life to view them as knowledgeable, charismatic and god-like. Consequently they seek romantic relationships with those who are easily swept off their feet in spite of obvious red flags. Once their lovers realize the narcissists true nature the relationship crumbles and the narcissist quickly finds ways to blame their partner for the break up.

Narcissists present a facade of confidence and of being in control when in fact they are covering for deep-seated insecurity and self hatred. Their ego is so under developed that they crave a constant flow of praise and admiration from others. When the narcissists facade is threatened they may go into overdrive attempting to convince others that they are right and that everyone around them is incompetent or vindictive.

Q. Do narcissists believe their lies?
A. Being exposed as a fraud is their worst fear and they may go to extremes to protect their perceived reputation even at the expense of the lives of those whom they perceive as a threat. Some severely ill narcissists would rather kill their loved ones than risk being caught in a lie. They may go to extremes to protect their elaborate web of denile.

The fragile ego of a narcissist compels them to constantly correct those around them, again, in an attempt to elevate themselves. By correcting grammer, being critical and impressing others with their knowledge they are in essence saying "I know better than you do. You are so inept that you need me to help you live your life the right way." They buy into their own lie but deep inside they feel like a fraud.

Q. How can I help someone who has narcissistic tendencies?
A. Helping a narcissist isn't easy. They see fault in everyone but themselves so pointing out their arrogant and abusive behaviors is likely to fall on deaf ears. NPD is a personality disorder which means that the assocdiated traits have been there most of their life. Because of this they are unlikely to change.

For more information go to www.Psych-Net.com/disorders.html

Social Awareness and Mental Disorders

2008-02-12T01:42:00.000-08:00

Mental illness has long been a social taboo. But the fact is that mental illness is as common as the common cold. Nearly everyone has symptoms from time to time. Depression is a mental illness and almost half of the population will suffer with a serious depression at some point in their life. ADD and ADHD are mental disorders and although they are both widely over diagnosed it seems that people have little or no problem labeling themselves or their children with one or the other.

The difference between these disorders, and others that are less acceptable, is education and mass understanding. The more society knows about a mental illness the more they are able to talk about it, and the more the fog lifts that has kept it mysterious and frightening. The mentally ill person has never been the root of cultural fears. The fear lies within the individual who is afraid of what they do not understand.

The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM IV) is the mental health worker's "Bible" for determining which mental disorder is appropriate for a patient. Some of the listings that are not as well know to the general public are sleep disorders such as insomnia, childhood disorders such as Mathematics Disorder, and substance disorders such as Nicotine Use Disorder. Of course there are specific criteria that needs to be present in order to be given such a diagnosis, but I mention them to make a point. No one is completely immune to developing a problem that needs psychological attention.
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Surviving Grief and Loss

2008-02-02T01:49:00.000-08:00

The winter months can be emotionally difficult for some of us. Perhaps the decrease in sun exposure plays a role. Or maybe it is the house-bound blues that contributes to feelings of sadness and grief. Feelings of grief can rise to the surface more easily during the winter months than any other time of year.

Intense feelings of grief can be overwhelming to the point of making it difficult to get through the day. It doesn't matter if you are grieving the loss of a loved one or the loss of a job, the toll of grief on the psyche can carry you down into the depths of intense pain.

Here are some guidelines to help you through the grief process:

Take your time. Everyone grieves at their own pace. Give yourself permission to go through the process at your own rate and in your own way.

Allow yourself to get back into the swing of things. Laughing or enjoying lunch with a friend is not betraying your deceased loved one. Ask yourself if your loved one would want you to be miserable, or would they want you to enjoy your life?

Talk about your loss. Talking about the good times, your feelings of sadness and your aspirations for the future is one of the fastest ways to get through the grieving process.

Get back into your hobbies. Engaging in activities that require focus and creativity can be very therapeutic.

Give yourself a specified amount of time everyday to actively grieve. Taking 15 minutes every morning to slow down and feel your deepest feelings will not only help you get through the process but once you have allowed yourself time to feel your feelings you can then dedicate the rest of your day to getting on with life.

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Britney, Mental Illness and Lay Interpretation

2008-01-22T10:12:00.000-08:00

Britney, Britney, Britney! In the last few months I have read articles claiming that Britney Spears is suffering from everything from drug addiction to multiple personalities. If you were to believe everything you read you would conclude that she is bi-polar, ADHD, psychotic, dissociative, narcissistic, depressed, suicidal, homicidal, alcoholic and a child abuser.

One thing I am sure of is that no one other than her own trained, professional, therapist can say for sure what is going on with her. And as far as I know, she doesn't have one.

It's curious how quickly lay people ascribe professional diagnosis to others. Everyone wants to believe that they are capable of diagnosing people with mental illness. If that were true it wouldn't take at least 7 years of college education and 2 years of a full time internship before therapists were able to do so.

I had a friend who, while divorcing her husband, began to tell everyone she knew that her husband had bi-polar disorder. He didn't. In fact he had never even been to a therapist and he didn't have the symptoms necessary for diagnosis. But she was sure of it, and so the rumor was spread around her small town.

Even insurance company employees want to believe that they have the ability to correctly diagnose patients they have only met on paper. I know a woman who has suffered with bi-polar disorder and psychosis for most of her adult life. She has a strong family history of the illness and all of the troubling symptoms that keep her from functioning in life. And yet her attempts to be granted Social Security Insurance have been denied over and over again. Her neighbor is a drug addict who was approved for Social Security the first time he applied - stating that his drug addiction kept him from keeping a job.

Mental Illness is a complex and often perplexing state of mind. Sometimes Its symptoms are easily noticed, more often they are not. Britney may be suffering from some form of mental illness, but unless and until the public is made aware of a specific illness it is senseless to speculate and cruel to arbitrarily assign a diagnosis.

Realizing Goals and New Year's Resolutions

2008-01-02T23:30:00.000-08:00

What's Your New Year's Resolution?

Every January 1st millions of people make a lighthearted decision to somehow change their life for the better. You may decide to loose weight or to spend more quality time with your family. Whatever it is, for most of us, by January 15th we have lost our momentum and our resolution becomes nothing more than a wish.

Keeping up with a New Year's Resolution requires more than desire. It takes a prepared mindset that allows you to stay focused and committed to the daily behaviors required to make a permanent change. The desire to change is a good step, but to actually make that change much more is needed.

Here are the necessary requirements to making your resolutions a reality.

1. Be specific. Make your goal something tangible. Saying that you are going to do better at work is too general, there isn't anything tangible to work toward.

2. Break your goal down into measurable steps that can be accomplished along the way so that you can realize the perks that come with achievement every day.

3. Give yourself a deadline. This will help to keep you on task and will prevent you from expecting to make it happen too quickly or to put it off indefinitely.

4. Decide how determined you are to make your goal a reality. Ask yourself if you are willing to do all that it takes for as long as it takes - even when you are tempted to loose focus. Are you doing this for the right reasons? Goals to change your life for someone else rarely work.

5. Be accountable to someone else. Goals desired in secrecy are too easily left on the wayside when the going gets tough. Enlist a partner with whom you can share your progress and struggles.

6. Make your resolution simple. Make it something that is doable, something that you know in your very core that you will achieve. Otherwise you fall prey to feelings of failure; and that is no way to start off your new year.

Childhood Depression and Self Injury

2007-12-21T02:31:00.000-08:00

When I was in graduate school one of my first clients was a woman who came in to talk about her depression. At her second session she confided that she was worried about her 3 year old son who was belligerent and often banged his head when he was frustrated. At the time I didn't really know what to make of it and I suggested that she take him to his pediatrician to be assessed for autism.

Because I was only a student therapist and she only had a few sessions with me, I never learned the outcome of her son's doctor visit.

If she were to come to see me now I would do things differently. I would have her bring her son in to be assessed for depression. We now know that depression can have strong familial and genetic ties. We also know that even very little children can suffer with depression. But because children are not verbally or emotionally sophisticated they show symptoms of depression in very different ways from adults. Both parents and pediatricians can miss the child's cries for help.

Children, even infants, have feelings of anger, frustration, stress and depression. But they don't know how to adequately communicate their feelings. Consequently their frustration and anxiety increases even further and they degenerate into an emotional heap; throwing a tantrum, screaming, hitting themselves in the head and throwing themselves onto the floor.

Parents become perplexed and worry that their child may be turning into a brat. Not so. Just as with adults, depression in children causes them to feel unheard, unloved and unworthy of love. The emotional pain of feeling unlovable is so great that they distract themselves from their emotional pain by focusing on creating physical pain.

If the child's depression and feelings of worthlessness go unchecked they may grow into teens and adults who begin cutting themselves, getting involved in masochistic sexual relationships or taking drugs, attempting to use physical pain as a distraction from their intense emotional pain.

If you have a child or infant who is frequently tantruming, banging their head, hitting themselves or otherwise causing themselves physical pain, take them to see a clinical psychologist who is well versed in childhood depression, to be assessed. Even if your family dynamics are such that they are contributing to the child's unhappy behavior, it is important to learn if there is a genetic component as well.

Don't be too quick to label your child belligerent or bratty. Punishing this behavior only validates the child's feelings of worthlessness and increases their anger and frustration. Depression isn't a choice. However you, the parent, can choose to help your suffering child.

Is That Normal?

2007-12-16T03:11:00.000-08:00

I'm often asked if a particular behavior is normal. As usual the answer is "It depends."

By definition, normal is something that conforms to a social standard, and the reasoning is valid. For instance, Most people are apprehensive around a poisonous snake, and the behavior of stepping away is valid - because the snake is capable of causing you harm.

In general you can determine if a particular behavior is normal by asking yourself if it, in any way, causes difficulty in any area of your life. For instance, spending an hour to apply your makeup in order to feel satisfied with your look is abnormal in that 1. most people can apply their make up in a few minutes, and 2. the time you spend applying makeup takes time away that could be put to better use. You may be loosing sleep because you wake up earlier than you would otherwise choose to, or you may be chronically late because of the time you spend on your makeup etc.

Sometimes the range of what is considered normal is quite varied. For instance the frequency of sex in a normal relationship can range from once a month to every day. That is because other issues are considered such as age, relationship length, health and personal preference. Still, frequency that does not fall within the social norm is considered abnormal.

Sometimes people rationalize that their deviant behavior is in fact normal by attesting that "everyone does it" when in fact everyone does not do it and in fact the majority of people do not. I recently heard a man use this rationale to justify his addiction to pornography.

So if you are wondering if a particular behavior is normal, ask yourself if most people would see it as the norm, and then ask yourself how accurate your reasoning is for engaging in the behavior. Is your life being adversely affected because of your behavior?

The trick is to be honest with yourself. Sometimes asking an unbiased other is a good way to get the best feedback.

Smells and Likeability

2007-12-07T00:42:00.000-08:00

New research from Northwestern University shows that people are sensitive to infinitesimal scents that affect whether or not we like somebody.

According to ScienceDaily (Dec. 7, 2007) "We may think our judgments are based only on various conscious bits of information, but our senses also may provide subliminal perceptual information that affects our behavior."

Apparently the study showed that smells that could be detected such as perfume and loud body odor did not effect the participants decision in determining the likability of a stranger. However, scents that were not readily noticed were powerful factors in the participants decision to like or not like someone.

The study adds to a growing body of research suggesting that subliminal sensory information -- whether from scents, vision or hearing -- affects perception.

*The paper "Subliminal Smells Can Guide Social Preferences" was published in the December issue of Psychological Science.

Shrink or be Shrunk, Your Brain on Anti-Depressants

2007-11-19T22:27:00.000-08:00

New research just out 2 weeks ago has determined that people who suffer with depression are also likely to suffer with brain shrinkage. It appears that depression causes the hypothalamus areas of the brain to atrophy under prolonged periods of stress and depression.

They hypothalamus works in conjunction with the limbic system which is the emotion-control center for your brain. The good news is that those who have taken anti-depressants for long term treatment have little or no atrophy of the brain.

Psychologists have suggested that those suffering with anxiety and depressive symptoms could be helped greatly by a combination of anti-depressant treatment and therapy. According to this study that is exactly what needs to happen.

Too often people refuse to take anti-depressants because they believe that by doing so they might appear weak. They refuse to go to therapy for the same reason. Now there is scientific proof that taking anti-depressants and going to therapy is not only the fastest way to end your depression and anxiety, but it is necessary for the normal functioning of your brain.

Stop giving in to your pride and start taking care of your brain.

Click here for full research article

Who's Living in Your Neighborhood?

2007-11-12T09:07:00.000-08:00

A few statistics about your neighborhood:

• One out of every 100 people in the population has been diagnosed with schizophrenia.
• Ten percent of the population have experienced depression this year and half of them deal with a lifetime of depressive episodes. Forty-five percent of your neighbors experience an episode of depression sometime before the age of 45.
• Fifteen percent of the general population has a diagnosable personality disorder.
• 0.5 – 2.5 percent of your neighbors suffer with clinical paranoia.
• Two percent of your neighbors have Antisocial Personality Disorder (formerly known as sociopaths)
• Two percent have incurable Borderline Personality Disorder
• One percent is diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and another 15% have significant symptoms of the disorder.
• Five percent have a schizoid or schizotypal disorder.
• Ten percent are significantly physically disabled.
• 2.6 to 3.4% are legally blind.
• 8.2% have significant hearing impairments – 0.8% have severe to profound hearing impairments.
• Three percent are mentally retarded.
• Between one and eight percent of children have specific learning disabilities.
• Between 0.5-1.5% have recurring seizures.
• forty-four percent of your neighbors have been divorced at least once.

Chances are that you or someone close to you suffers some form of mental, physical or emotional disability. Isn't it time that we removed the stigmas and reserved our judgment?

Owen Wilson, Suicide & Stopping the Pain

2007-10-25T23:22:00.000-07:00

Owen Wilson is scheduled to give a My Space interview later today in which he is expected to finally discuss his attempted suicide last August.

In August the New York Post reported that the distraught actor was found "bloodied and dazed after overdosing on pills and slitting his wrists." The article added that "Wilson, 38, tried to take his own life after a bitter blowup with a close pal."

So how is it that even people who seem to have everything, who appear happy, stable and mentally healthy can laps into depression so deeply that they want to die? It may be difficult to understand but it is not unusual.

Depression is largely a silent killer. Because of stigma and denial the depressed person attempts to hide their symptoms from the world and even from themselves. When in public they put on a smiling mask and do their best to get through their day - until they sink so low that they can no longer function in public.

Even then the depressed person may claim illness or exhaustion to disguise their mental darkness and emotional pain. The pain becomes so intolerable that they begin to believe that the only way to stop it is to end their life. Family and friends have their own denial to defend them from having to deal with something as frightening as a loved one's depressed mental state. And so the symptoms go unnoticed until it is too late.

Dissolving the taboo surrounding the topic of depression is one way to curtail a loved one's attempt at suicide. But our culture has a long way to go before we feel secure enough with our own ability to deal with anothers dark emotions. It takes courage, self awareness and understanding.

For more information about:
Depression click here
Depression Questions Answered click here.
More Answers click here
Suicide click here
Suicide Questions & Answers click here
Despair click here
Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)click here

Consumer Beware - Therapy for Therapists

2007-10-09T01:33:00.000-07:00

Human beings have a tendency to stereotype and compartmentalize others. This is especially true for those in our culture that hold positions of authority such as doctors, clergy and police officers. We see them functioning in their profession and tend to forget that they are just people like us with families, problems and failings. This fact is particularly true for those who work in the mental health field.

This fact in of itself isn't a problem. The problem arises when those wishing to become therapists, counselors and psychologists are doing so as a way to elevate themselves in the eyes of others, and to mask their deep seated insecurities and lack of self-love behind a diploma. Somewhere inside they know that they need therapy themselves, but they are afraid to do the painful work of self introspection that therapy provides and that healing requires. So they get a degree in psychology instead. They may believe that having an education will eliminate their need for therapy - not so.

Without proper help, the educated, unhealed therapist attempts to convince themselves and others that their profession defines them. People look to them for answers in their own life expecting that the therapists' advice will be based on having gained mastery over their own emotional, marital and childhood difficulties. The unhealed therapist is perpetuating a lie and fraudulently takes money without the ability to sufficiently help others.

A therapist cannot lift a client higher than where they themselves are standing. Consequently it is imperative that each therapist be willing to do their own work before attempting to help others. To deny themselves of this is to live life as a fraud.

As a consumer, it is vital that you understand that about 50% of all therapists should be on the couch rather than behind it. Never assume that your therapist has all the answers. And realize that you may have to visit several therapists before you find one that is mentally healthy enough to lift you up to where you want to be.

Adult Children of Divorce - How to Cope

2007-10-01T19:17:00.000-07:00

Most people these days have some understanding of the emotional trauma that children undergo when their parents divorce. Because of the increase of divorce during the 80's much of the latest research has focused on adult children of divorce - both those who were young when their parent's divorced and those who are adults dealing with a parent's divorce.

What has been very telling in the latest research is the finding that adults who's parent's have long since divorced report having unresolved feelings that directly relate to the early family break-up. Many report still feeling partly responsible for their parent's divorce, and most report having had much difficulty in their adult life forming and maintaining healthy relationships.

Another interesting finding is that for those who are adults at the time of their parent's divorce, the feelings of confusion, fear, guilt and insecurity are much the same as they are for children who's parents divorce. They worry about family gatherings and who will be upset if the adult child spends time with the other parent. They feel torn in their desire to remain loyal to both parents. They fear loosing the love or the relationship with one or both parents. Overall, the feelings, the trauma and the discomfort remains the same - just the level of understanding differs.

Here are some ways that adult children can begin to cope:

* The adult child should firmly, but lovingly, refuse to be drawn into the middle of the conflict.

* Don't get involved in their financial arrangements or invite one parent to live with you during their transition.

* The adult child needs to have a well developed support network that allows a "safe" place to let out feelings and to recieve helpful input.

* Grieving is normal! you need to allow yourself times to cry, times to vent, and times to feel sad. It's OK.

* It's important to work on forgiving your parents weaknesses and faults. A little understanding and reasonable expectations go a long way toward healing.

* Family gatherings are important. However, some of them may need to be adjusted to meet the changed family situation. Be flexible.

* Create your own traditions and family activities. This helps the healing process and strengthens the family ties.

* Spend positive time together at the new family gatherings. Find fun things to do to help deal with stress and to begin rebuilding.

* If angry feelings bubble to the surface when family is together politely excuse yourself and later let the family know that you refuse to be involved in any type of gossip or angry banter against other members of the family.

Insecurity & the Green Eyed Monster

2007-09-24T00:23:00.000-07:00

A young woman cornered me in the hall today while between classes. Although she looked very young it appeared that she had 3 small children under the age of 5. She began by telling me what a wonderful man her husband was and then added that even though she knows that he is faithful to her, at times she flips into the Green Eyed Monster if she sees him in the vicinity of a woman.

Intellectually she understands that he has done nothing wrong, but emotionally she feels terrified that he will eventually see another woman and then leave her. She wanted to know how she can learn how to trust people.

I realized that in the few seconds we had in the hallway there was no magic answer I could offer that would bring her the peace that she desired. What I did say was this - I told her that irrational jealousy (the kind that is not based on fact but on emotion alone) has nothing to do with trusting one's spouse. I told her that in fact this type of jealousy is rooted in her negative feelings about herself, and her belief that she wasn't good enough or pretty enough or wife enough for him - or any man. Deep down She had great difficulty loving herself and so it was very difficult for her to understand how anyone else could love her.

So she was creating a dialog in her mind that told her that one of these days he will discover just how worthless she is and then he will go off with a real woman. She doesn't trust herself enough to believe that she can be a good enough person for this man who is so loving, spiritual and wonderful - surely she didn't truly deserve him right?

Tears rose in her eyes and she looked at me clearly and said "So it is me isn't it? I'm the one who needs to work this out." "Yes" I said gently. And that doesn't mean that there is something defective in you. Most young women go through periods in their life when they feel insecure and jealous. But you are way ahead of them because you have the desire to figure out what's wrong so you can change it before it becomes a problem."

I told her that even I had tangled with the Green Eyed Monster as a young bride, and that I successfully overcame it, and so could she. She smiled and seemed to feel great relief. She had a new understanding and a goal to work toward, and most of all she was motivated by the love of her family and her desire to love herself; and to make this change a priority in her life.

Before one can change a problem, we first have to recognize that there is a problem. Once we realize there is a problem we need to have the courage to deal with it and replace it with something positive that will enrich our life.

Weight Loss & the Latest Studies

2007-09-17T21:27:00.000-07:00

Weight loss. Most of us have had to think about it, all of us have an opinion about it but few really understand why it is so difficult for one person to maintain a healthy weight while for others it just seems like an impossibility.

Studies abound stating everything from the longevity benefits from weight loss to touting that overweight people who are otherwise healthy may increase their risk of dying by intentionally losing weight, according to provocative new research. The truth is that not even the scientific community fully understands the psychological and physiological reasons for obesity.

A recent study shows that many of those who cannot seem to eat less have a deficiency of certain hormones in the hypothalamus causing them to be unaware of feeling full until their belly feels engorged.

Another study mirrors what psychologists have said for years, that the hypothalamus is programmed to feel satiated by three emotions, hunger satiation, sexual satiation or anger release. It suggests that of the three having sex is the best way to satisfy the bodies chemical needs and prevent over eating as an emotional crutch.

With Science being at the forefront of discovering how our brain and body are connected it seems that learning why some people find it easier to remain thin while others fight weight their entire life should be forthcoming. In the meantime however, let's be satisfied to understand that not every "body" is the same.

In fact, eating healthy and exercising is a good general rule of thumb for everyone. But for many, doing so is much more difficult; and the truth is, we don't really understand why. Perhaps we as a people can be less judgmental and more compassionate when it comes to the issue of weight.

Worry, Anxiety & Self Confidence

2007-09-03T05:29:00.000-07:00

Worry is one of the most common forms of anxiety, and one of the easiest to understand. We worry because we don't like the feeling of not being in control of the world around us. We worry because we have at some point in our life convinced ourself that if we can't control the world around us, then worry is the next best way to stay on top of those things we cannot control.

Anxiety or worrying in its simplest form is neither a problem nor an emotional deficit. It is when we have created a habit of worrying that interferes with our ability to fully relax and/or enjoy life that it can become a devastating problem.

The degree to which we worry is directly linked to our lack of self confidence. We worry because deep inside we do not believe that we have the ability to cope with the traumatic situations we worry about. We become anxious and worry because we do not have confidence in our own ability to deal with the difficulties that life might present to us.

Acknowledging your worrying as a negative influence in your life is the first step. Making a commitment to overcome your irrational fears by replacing a negative habit with something more positive is the way to begin your journey toward a healthier way of coping with life.

One of the best ways to begin to work your way out of habitually worrying is to start a worry journal.

Whenever you find yourself worrying intensely about something, write your worry down in your journal.
Attempt to determine to what degree your fear is rational and to what degree it is having a negative effect on your emotions, and behaviors.
Then think through the scenario that is fearful to you and imagine to what degree you would be able to take control of the situation. Find those aspects of your personality that will enable you to cope, to survive and to carry on in spite of life's unexpected difficulties. In essence create a plan of empowerment.

Most of us are afraid of what we do not understand and what we fear we cannot control. So begin by replacing irrational fears with rational solutions. Doing so will increase your level of self confidence. And when you feel confident in your ability to deal with life's trials, you will no longer have the need to worry.

Computer Program for Healing Depression

2007-08-29T05:42:00.000-07:00

By guest writer Caroline Lovell

Computerized cognitive behavioral therapy can reduce physical symptoms and illnesses caused by depression by over 25%, according to new research.

Despina Learmouth at City University, London, looked at the effect of the Beating the Blues interactive therapy system on 504 service users.

“These findings are significant because besides the obvious fact that alleviating depression is important for individuals’ well being, physical illnesses and symptoms are known to be made worse by mental ill health,” said Learmouth. “Pain can become worse, immune functioning can be lowered, and stress levels can be increased – leading to further potential health risks.”

Beating the Blues was recommended for use by the National Institute for Clinical Excellence last year.

In April, the (English) government issued guidance urging primary care trusts to make the system available to people with anxiety and depression.

Click here to read more about the program

Post Traumatic Stress and the Media

2007-08-17T05:14:00.000-07:00

Post Traumatic Stress disorder or PTSD is a very real and very curable problem. Anyone, even an infant can acquire symptoms of PTSD upon experiencing a serious trauma.

When my brother first saw the movie "Forest Gump" he nearly hit the floor during the scenes about Vietnam. Not because of the film, but because of the realistic sounds of the gunfire. It had been decades since he was in Vietnam but the piercing sound of gunfire that seemed to be coming from behind the movie viewers was enough to take him back to fright-filled days at war.

In today's world of 24/7 news coverage of terrorism, war and crime, it is even possible for someone to develop PTSD by immersing themselves in videos and newscasts about an event in which they had no actual involvement. This was made clear to clinicians after 911, and again during the Virginia Tech shootings.

After the Virginia Tech shootings however the process of developing PTSD was more widely understood, and after a few days nearly all of the footage was taken off the air. For those who had already watched hours of video, and who were already at risk for PTSD, it was too late.

Children are particularly at risk of developing intense stress reactions upon watching real or realistic events on film or television. Intense fear can cause them to regress into more childlike behaviors like wetting the bed, moodieness or having nightmares.

If you suspect that you or your child is experiencing serious effects of stress it is important that you get help immediately. Otherwise the stress can hang on for year, and can develop into phobias and other psychological problems.

Technorati Profile

The Real Role of Rehab

2007-06-09T01:58:00.000-07:00

How Rehab Works
Rehab isn't designed to help people who what to escape jail time or who want a reprieve from public scrutiny. Regardless of your social status rehab only works for those who fully work the program during and after treatment.

Whether you're a celebrity or just a regular person, addiction treatment typically involves a similar series of steps:

* Detoxification. About half of the addicts who come to Butler Hospital in Providence, R.I., must check in as an inpatient for three to five days of "acute stabilization," Alan Gordon, MD, Butler's chief of addiction rehabilitation, tells WebMD. Some must cope with symptoms of withdrawal such as tremors, paranoia, and depression. Others must deal with the crises that brought them in to treatment, such as legal or domestic problems. (In outpatient programs like those at Butler Hospital, "detox" is the only inpatient component.)
* Diagnosis. Many addicts also suffer from psychiatric problems--such as sleep disorders, bipolar disorder, depression, and anxiety--or have faced traumatic life experiences such as rape or incest. While the exact relation between these problems and substance abuse may not be clear, many addiction treatment programs link up patients with psychiatrists or therapy groups.
* Cognitive therapy. This therapy helps addicts realize which life situations are most likely to trigger substance abuse, says Newt Galusha, MD, of Harris Methodist Springwood Hospital in Bedford, Texas. Then the addicts develop alternative plans. For example, if an addict usually drinks after arguing with a spouse, he might learn to end those fights by counting to 10 or going to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting instead of going to a bar. Addicts also learn "assertive skills" that help them learn how to say no to drugs or alcohol, Gordon says.
* Family therapy. Many programs bring family members into the program to heal damaged relationships and shore up the addict's support network. Support from family members is key to helping addicts stay clean over the long run, Garrett O'Connor, MD, chief psychiatrist at the Betty Ford Center, tells WebMD.
* Medication. An FDA-approved medication, Campral, helps people with alcohol dependence who have quit stay alcohol-free. Another FDA-approved drug, Suboxone, treats addiction to opiates (including heroin and some prescription painkillers); it reduces withdrawal symptoms and cravings. Suboxone has a similar effect as methadone but is less prone to abuse, Gordon says.
* Introduction to 12-step programs. The Scripps McDonald treatment center in La Jolla, Calif., recommends "90 meetings in 90 days" for all of its patients, says Fred Berger, MD, center medical director. Many centers encourage patients to attend Alcoholics Anonymous or other forms of group therapy for a year or more after treatment.

The Difference Between Psychology and Psychiatry

2007-05-02T01:29:00.000-07:00

I am often asked what the difference is between a Psychologist and a Psychiatrist.

Basically a Psychologist is someone who spent their entire collegiate experience pursuing an education in human behavior. There are literally hundreds of types of degrees one can get under the heading of Psychology, including Clinical Psychology which is typically used to treat individuals and families in a therapeutic setting.

A psychologist is the professional ones seeks to deal with everything from marriage trouble to a serious mental illness. Therapy is generally done on a weekly basis in either an office setting, a clinic or hospital setting. Psychologists are not medical doctors and therefore cannot prescribe medicine such as anti-depressants or sleep aids.

A Psychiatrist on the other hand was a medical doctor first. S/he went to medical school and received a degree in medicine. Many psychiatrists set out to become psychiatrists, but many realize their calling after doing their "psych" rotation while pursuing their medical degree.

Those medical doctors who want to become psychiatrists finish an additional 1-2 year program in human behavior and psychopharmachology in order to become a mental health professional. Because they have a degree in medicine they are able to prescribe drugs to their patients.

In the US, psychiatry has become largely a profession of assessment and pharmaceutical maintenance for their patients, while psychology has taken on the major role of ongoing therapy. It is not uncommon for a patient to see their psychologist for weekly therapy while only seeing their psychiatrist quarterly for a brief assessment and a prescription renewal.

Profile of a Mass Murderer

2007-04-17T23:50:00.000-07:00

In light of the horrific mass murder at Virginia Tech this week I am focusing this blog on the symptoms of a Mass Murder. These studies were published a few years ago in The Journal of Psychiatry. More information about paranoia, schizophrenia and other disorders can be found at Psych-Net Mental Health.

These statistics were derived from a study of mass murders age 13-19 who killed 3 or more people in one event. The sample consisted of males with a median age of 17.

The majority were described as loners

Most abused alcohol or drugs

Almost half were bullied by others

Preoccupied with violent fantasy

Had a violent by history

23% had a documented psychiatric history but only 6% were judged to have been psychotic at the time of the mass murder

Depressive symptoms

A history of antisocial behaviors

A precipitating event in most cases-usually a perceived failure in love or school

Most subjects made threatening statements regarding the mass murder to third parties

The majority of the sample clustered into three types:

the family annihilator,

the classroom avenger,

and the criminal opportunist.

The adolescent mass murderer is often predatorily rather than affectively violent and typically does not show any sudden or highly emotional warning signs. Although the act of mass murder is virtually impossible to predict because of its extremely low frequency, certain clinical and forensic findings can alert the clinician to the need for further, intensified primary care, including family, school, community, law enforcement, and mental health intervention.

Prozac and Other SSRI Anti-Depressant Drugs

2007-04-11T22:09:00.000-07:00

Prozac, Zoloft, Effexor and other anti-depression drugs are often a mystery to those who need them. Here is a quick definition and explanation of commonly prescribed SSRI drugs.

SSRIs are selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors. Seratonin is a chemical in the brain that has been found to be a type of mood regulator. Too little seratonin can create a depressed mood and continually low levels can contribute to clinical depression.

Your brain automatically creates seratonin, and as a natural regulator, receptors in your brain act like little vacuums, sucking up excess seratonin. But when your brain goes into turbo suction mode, it can create a shortage of seratonin which can lead to depression, anxiety and other unpleasant moods.

So SSRI drugs simply inhibits, or slows down, the suction (or reuptake) of your brain's seratonin, which in turn alleviates the depressed mood.

So when you hear someone complain that they don't want to take "mood altering drugs" to treat their depression or anxiety, let them know that the SSRI drugs only help your brain do what it was supposed to be doing all along.

Is ADHD, ADD Real?

2007-04-03T23:58:00.000-07:00

Many of you have heard by now that the latest research has shown that as many as 85% of all children in the USA that have been diagnosed with ADD or ADHD (Attention Deficit Disorder and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) have been misdiagnosed. Consequently, thousands of our school age children have been given harsh, addictive drugs for years. For many of them, once they have grown to adulthood, feel they have little choice but to begin using illegal drugs like cocaine to maintain their habit.

We are raising a generation of drug dependent people who have a defeatist, victim attitude about life in general. Instead of growing up clear-headed and optimistic about life, they were being misdiagnosed for years, ingesting drugs that they didn't need. Their brains have been soaked in a chemical brine that can cause all kinds of other problems. Often they take on a victim role and they use their "diagnosis" as a way to avoid social, academic and occupational success.

The good news is that there are now definitive medical tests that can be done to determine once and for all if someone has ADD or ADHD. The unpleasant news is that most of those tested are found not to have either illness. How is that unpleasant you ask?

Well, suddenly realizing that your child has been ingesting powerful, mind altering drugs, can devastate even the most forgiving parent. And there is the original issue that still needs to be addressed; "What is the cause of my child's poor behavior?"

Being mature and sophisticated enough to accept that family dynamics may have started this whole ball rolling is difficult to assimilate. Most people want to blame someone else instead of looking at the obvious especially when it means taking some of the responsibility for the problem.

Who is the best patent here? The one who refuses to look at the truth or the parent who is willing to took around every corner to find all the pieced to this complicated puzzle?

For more information google Dr. Frank Lawless, a world leader regarding ADHD and ADD.

Bi Polar Disorder

2007-03-29T00:38:00.000-07:00

Vincent Van Gogh once wrote:
"I put my heart and my soul into my work, and have lost my mind in the process."

Modern Psychologists have surmised that Vincent Van Gogh had Bi-Polar Disorder (BPD). BPD is a brain disorder that causes one's moods to swing between mania and depression. In its most severe form it can cause one to loose touch with reality.

With Van Gogh, the deterioration of his mental status is apparent in his artwork; however most will agree that his best work was done during the last years of his life. So how is it that we are often eager to classify the mentally ill as unimportant to society? Presumably many of the worlds most gifted artists and scholars were affected with BPD. On the other hand, most were sent to asylums or were left to peddle for food in the streets.

What is Bi-Polar Disorder?

People affected with BPD may swing back and forth from depression to mania on a regular basis or they may experience a "calm" or "normal" period between episodes.

Symptoms of Mania:

1. Inappropriate elation
2. Inappropriate irritability
3. Severe insomnia
4. Grandiose notions
5. Increased talking
6. Disconnected and racing thoughts
7. Increased sexual desire
8. Markedly increased energy
9. Poor judgment
10. Inappropriate social behavior

Not everyone who is depressed or manic experiences every symptom. Some people experience a few symptoms, some have many. Also, the severity of symptoms varies with individuals.

For more on BPD go to Psych-Net.com

What is Cognative Behavioral Therapy?

2007-03-22T00:30:00.000-07:00

I am a proponent of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy or CBT, and I am often asked to explain what that means. Although it is difficult to do it in four paragraphs or less let me give it a shot.

CBT is effective because it teaches the client to modify patterns of thinking which affect behavior. CBT is a straight-forward therapy which is designed to alert the client to self-defeating ways of thinking. This type of therapy focuses on the client's negative self-talk, and offers practical suggestions on how to re frame one's thinking to make it more adaptive. The CBT therapist assists the client in thinking more rationally by examining the individuals nonsensical thoughts, observing ways in which they may distort reality, and reducing the amount of assumptions or beliefs that negatively affect their ways of thinking and behaving.

Homework is an integral part of therapy, patients will be encouraged to complete exercises designed to change negative thinking. A typical assignment is to help the client to identify current troubling events, negative self-talk, and ways of rationally responding to situations sited. Then, during the week, the client journals about difficult situations, identifies self-defeating thinking and refutes the negative thought processes with more rationally adaptive way of responding to events. The journal is often reviewed in the next session.

With CBT, clients are in control of their own progress. They are aware of the process that is necessary for change, and diligently work at modifying faulty thought patterns. Therapeutic progress is easily monitored through self-inventories and patient feedback.

Individuals with anxiety, addictive patterns and depressive disorders are particularly well suited to benefiting from this from of treatment. The good news is that many behavioral health disorders can be treated successfully through cognitive-behavioral therapy. NACBT or The National Association of Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy is a good resource for locating counselors who are sufficiently trained, certified, and specialize in this treatment approach.

Alcohol Abuse Test

2007-03-14T03:32:00.000-07:00

Select either yes or no for each of the following questions as they apply to your life and your alcohol consumption. Add up your score by adding the number 1 or 2 that coresponds with your answer. At the end there is a link to take you to the results for your score.
1. Do you feel you are a normal drinker?
1 yes
2 no

2. Have you ever realized you don't remember periods of time when you were drinking?
2 yes
1 no

3. Do people close to you complain of your drinking?
2 yes
1 no

4. Do you ever feel guilty about your drinking?
2 yes
1 no

5. Do your friends or relatives think you are a normal drinker?
1 yes
2 no
insert bold tagsn style="font-weight:bold;">
6. Can you stop drinking when you want to?
1 yes
2 no

7. Have you ever been violent when drinking
2 yes
1 no

8. Has drinking ever caused problems between you and your family members?
2 yes
1 no

9. Has any close relative gone to someone for help about your drinking?
2 yes
1 no

10. Have you ever lost friends because of your drinking?
2 yes
1 no

11. Have you ever had problems at work because of your drinking?
2 yes
1 no

12. Have you ever lost a job because of effects, or use, of alcohol.
2 yes
1 no

13. Have you ever neglected obligations, your family, or work for 2 or more days because you were drinking?
2 yes
1 no

14. Do you drink before noon fairly often?
2 yes
1 no

15. After heavy drinking have you ever had DT's or severe shaking, seen things or heard voices that weren't there?
2 yes
1 no

16. Have you ever gone to anyone for help about your drinking?
2 yes
1 no

17. Have you ever been in a hospital because of your drinking?
2 yes
1 no

18. Have you ever sought professional help for an emotional problem where drinking was part of the problem?
2 yes
1 no

19. Have you ever been arrested for drunk driving while under the influence of alcohol?
2 yes
1 no

20. Have you ever been arrested or detained because of drunken behavior?
2 yes
1 no

Add up your score and follow the links for a full evaluation.
This scale is for your entertainment only and is not to be used as a diagnostic tool or in lieu of professional help.

Add up your score and Click here for results

How Can I Overcome My Anger?

2007-03-06T23:09:00.000-08:00

Q. I have trouble controlling and expressing my anger. Are there any meditative techniques or therapies that can help me handle my aggression in a constructive fashion?

A. The solution is to become aware of the anger and its cause, and then learn ways to express your emotions calmly -- rather than lashing out at the world around you. The goal isn't to suppress your anger, but to get it out in a nonabrasive way.

We're now fairly sure that anger, either expressed violently or turned inward, impacts your health negatively. An increasing body of evidence shows that anger is a risk factor for coronary heart disease and sudden death. A six-year study at the University of North Carolina characterized the anger traits of 12,986 men and women. The results, published in the May 6, 2000 issue of "The Lancet," found that subjects with the most anger traits were two to seven times more likely to develop coronary heart disease. Some people who couldn't express their anger transformed it into physical tensions such as headaches, stomachaches, or difficulty breathing. I know one woman who would feel a painful tightness in her throat whenever she needed to express an emotion but, instead, kept it inside. Watch for these signs and try to become aware of the emotion you may be feeling.

Anger isn't always bad -- it can be useful. I've seen it mobilize healing responses, for example. One patient struggling with an autoimmune disease was able to overcome it through a complete reworking of his lifestyle and the use of various mind-body techniques. An important part of his recovery was becoming aware of -- and expressing -- his anger toward doctors and hospitals.

As you become conscious of your anger, begin to distinguish between the mildly annoying and the infuriating. With the things that anger you most, try to figure out what else you're feeling -- powerless? guilty? stupid? Once you've learned to recognize anger and identify its roots, it will be easier to express it constructively.

Psychotherapy, hypnotherapy, and spiritual counseling may be useful in dealing with anger. Exercise is also an excellent way to cope with strong emotions -- both long-term and immediately. Several studies have found that physical activities such as swimming and yoga can ease anger and tension. Even one round of exercise -- say, a run around the block -- can significantly improve the way you feel.

Incorporate meditation and relaxation techniques into your daily routine. My breathing exercise will help you bring calmness throughout your body. Do it at least twice a day, and try it every time you feel anxious or upset.

Narcolepsy - Mental Disorder or Medical Problem?

2007-02-27T22:24:00.000-08:00

Several years ago a woman emailed me for having narcolepsy listed as one of the Diagnostic & Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM IV) mental disorders. Her daughter had recently been diagnosed with this illness and she was incensed that it was listed with other "mental disorders," insisting that her daughter wasn't "crazy." After asking her not to "kill the messenger," I wrote an article about how in today's enlightened age, we still put such a negative stigma on mental disorders.

Our brains are a mental organ and anything that effects our brain is considered a mental issue. Therefore narcolepsy is an appropriate listing for the DSM IV. Here are the facts about narcolepsy:

Narcolepsy is a disorder marked by excessive daytime sleepiness, uncontrollable sleep attacks, and cataplexy (a sudden loss of muscle tone, usually lasting up to half an hour).

Narcolepsy is the second-leading cause of excessive daytime sleepiness (after obstructive sleep apnea). Persistent sleepiness and sleep attacks are the hallmarks of this condition. The sleepiness has been compared to the feeling of trying to stay awake after not sleeping for two or three days.

People with narcolepsy fall asleep suddenly—any-where, at any time, even in the middle of a conversation. These sleep attacks can last from a few seconds to more than an hour. Depending on where the sleep attacks occur, they may be mildly inconvenient or even dangerous to the person, particularly if they occur while driving. Some people continue to function outwardly during the sleep episodes, such as continuing a conversation or putting things away. But when they wake up, they have no memory of the event.

There is no cure for narcolepsy. It is not progressive, and it is not fatal, but it is a chronic disorder. The symptoms can be managed with lifestyle adjustments and/or medication.

People with narcolepsy must plan their days carefully. Scheduling regular naps (either several short, 15-minute naps or one long nap in the afternoon) can help boost alertness and wakefulness. A full eight hours of nighttime sleep should also be a goal. Exercise can often help people with narcolepsy feel more alert and energetic, although they should avoid exercising within a few hours of bedtime. Substances that contain alcohol, nicotine, and caffeine should be avoided because they can interfere with refreshing sleep and with daytime alertness.

For more on Narcolepsy and other sleep disorders Click Here to go to Psych-Net.com

Coping With Post Traumatic Stress

2007-02-14T01:37:00.000-08:00

Horrible news is all around us; the war, terrorism, local crime. It can effect our mind, body and our spirit. Even our little children can become anxious and stressed by hearing too much about what is going on in the world. "Bad News overload" can cause some to feel the effects of Post Traumatic Stress. So, here are some things you can do to help alleviate your stress induced feelings of fear and overwhelm:

* First, Stop the Trauma! If you have control over what you and your children watch on television or read in the paper, limit those activities and replace them with activities that bring positive attitudes like Watching a gardening show or reading only the Entertainment section of the paper. Do the crossword puzzles and other mind bending games available. Just stop engrossing yourself in the worrisome events of the world!
* Use your support system, friends, family, and coworkers to talk to at your own pace. Be mindful not to say more than you are comfortable with.
* You are not alone, weak or crazy. Hundreds of thousands of people are being effected just like you are.
* Talk to other trauma survivors for support. When survivors are able to talk about their problems with others, something helpful often results. You may come to feel less alone, feel supported or understood, or you may get concrete advice. One of the best places to find support is in a specially designed support group.
* Talk to a doctor about trauma and PTSD. Part of taking care of yourself means mobilizing all the helping resources that are available.
* Practice relaxation methods. These can include muscular relaxation exercises, breathing exercises, meditation, swimming, stretching, yoga, prayer, listening to quiet music, spending time in nature, and so on.
* Increase positive distracting activities. Recreational or work activities can help distract you from your stressful memories and reactions. Artistic endeavors are also a way for you to express feelings in a positive, creative way. These endeavors can help improve your mood, limit the harm caused by PTSD, and can help you rebuild your life. It is important to emphasize that distraction alone is not enough; active, directly coping with the traumatic events and their impact is also important.
* Call a counselor for help. Sometimes stress symptoms worsen and ordinary efforts at coping may not be enough for you to heal. If you feel fearful or depressed, it is important that you reach out for help from a counselor, who can help you turn things around.
* Taking prescribed medications to tackle PTSD may be suggested. Many people with PTSD have found that by taking medications they are able to improve their sleep, anxiety, irritability and anger, or urges to drink or abuse drugs.
* Start an exercise routine. It's important to see a doctor before starting to exercise, but after getting the OK, exercise in moderation will help alleviate stress in a number of ways.
* Volunteer in the community. It's important to feel like you have something to offer to others and that you are making a contribution. Help with youth programs, medical services, literacy programs, community sporting activities, and so on.

You don't need to live your life constantly stressed and worried. Take a step now to begin getting your life back. You Can Do This!

Suicide Rate Up by 18% for Teens, - this article could save their life

2007-02-07T02:29:00.000-08:00

According to a new study that came out earlier this week from the Pediatrics Journal of Medicine there has been a serious increase in suicides among teenagers in the last few years. Speculation is that the increase in suicides is connected to the recent media and FDA reports stating that certain antidepressant drugs can cause some teenagers to feel suicidal. However since those drugs are no longer being offered to teenagers suffering with depression, the suicide rate has increased by 18%. And that is totally unacceptable.

It is true that Prozac may have ill effects on some children, but there are so many new antidepressant drugs available now that it is bad medicine to throw the baby out with the bath water and refuse to offer any type of medicinal help for these suffering teens. Those who are now a part of that 18% statistic may have found help in other, safer drugs like Levequine, Welbutrine or Tomazipam. If their family, friends, and doctors had been willing to try them on a drug that was safe for them, those children might still be alive and well today.

Today my soap box includes frustration at huge conglomerates like the FDA making life and death decisions based on insufficient studies and then globalizing their findings to include all available medications. They make policies and laws to prevent the people from getting the right help, the best help for them.

I'm a parent first, and if my child needed a drug that might save his life, I would do whatever it was in my power to do, to get the right doctor and the best medication. The

FDA for all the good they do, have in my opinion really messed one up here.

Full article about the research is here.

Preventing Mental Illness in Your Children

2007-01-31T02:41:00.000-08:00

This Research Study May Save Your Child's Life

According to Dr. Will Sears, a well renowned pediatrician and author of many parenting books, a remarkable study just came out this month which shows that allowing your baby to cry (instead of nurturing the child and attending to its needs), can lead to brain damage and mental illness.

The study was taken over a 40 year period with infants and toddlers. The most striking findings show beyond doubt that when children cry and work themselves up into a crying frenzy, their body goes into stress overload causing the major arteries to the brain to tighten and close down. Once this happens the babies brain cannot get enough oxygen and the brain begins to die from oxygen deprivation resulting in permanent brain damage.

Babies who's mothers nurture them and attend to their needs were more likely to understand that crying is their child's only way to communicate their fears, discomfort and needs. Dr. Sears stated that babies who are put to sleep in a room away from parents, behind bars in a crib, in the dark will feel abandoned and frightened. Whereas babies who are quickly comforted when they cry are 80% less likely to develop panic disorders, depression and stress related illness later in life. Even SIDS is reduced by over 50% when the child is not allowed to cry, but is nurtured instead (More on SIDS in a later article).

The researchers agree, it is impossible to spoil a baby with love and nurturing. That is exactly what they need to grow into healthy, confidant and secure adults. But believing that your child needs to "cry it out" or to "cry herself to sleep" may be causing permanent damage.

Stop expecting too much from your little child and start seeing the world through their little eyes. Empathizing with your child will help you keep your cool when those nighttime rituals begin to feel like a chore.

Insecurity and the Fear of Failure

2007-01-23T21:17:00.000-08:00

Reaching our full potential in life means never ceasing to evolve and grow beyond who we are today. It means constantly learning new things and being willing to share our talents with the world. But for many, taking that next step into the unknown can be paralyzing.

After years of being in front of the camera Donny Osmond admitted to the world that he had a serious social phobia. And yet every day he forced himself to overcome his symptoms and step back out into the limelight. He had learned that although he felt paralyzed, he was capable of controlling his own destiny. And that is what all of us, who allow the fear of failure to stop our personal growth, need to do.

Going from a place of fear to a place of self confidence and success requires one to be vulnerable to the masses. It requires one to let go of the notion of perfection and the belief that the opinion of others is worth more than their own. It takes a world view of living for one’s self instead of living for validation from others.

In the end, what the rest of the world thinks of us means very little. But when we live our life fully, attempting to reach our full potential, we do succeed. And when one’s life has been spent in pursuit of the uplifting and noble, the rest of the world generally appreciates our efforts.

Do something today to challenge insecurity. Step into the unknown and feel the gratification of knowing you can.

Are Video Games Addictive? Why?

2007-01-16T21:22:00.001-08:00

More than just fun, a 2007 study suggests that the best gaming platforms fulfill basic psychological needs.

A study that just came out this month shows that video games may be difficult to give up because the authors have discovered a way to put such realism into the games that they are actually fulfilling basic human needs.

Although some games were found to be just "fun" it was the games that provided opportunities for achievement, freedom and a connection to other players that created a players desire to come back again and again. "Players reported feeling the best when the games produced positive experiences and challenges that connected to what they knew in the real world," said one researcher.

It's the gamers' connection to other players that's the psychological pull of games, the study reports. And it is their capacity to create feelings of autonomy, competence and relatedness" - thus creating a short term feeling of wellness that brings players back.

For those who play massively multiplayer online, or MMO, games -- which are capable of supporting many thousands of players simultaneously -- the need for relatedness was found to be a key satisfaction, one that promotes a sense of presence, game enjoyment and an intention for future play," the researchers found.

In our culture of latch-key kids and using video games and the television as babysitters are our children being vicariously denied their basic psychological needs? It would seem so. If not, they would not have the intense need to find electronic ways to get their needs met. Healthy families require time - both quality and quantity.

Source: HealthDay, Medline, and psych-net.com

January Depression, Winter Blues & SAD

2007-01-09T20:12:00.000-08:00

January is the month when people are suffering from after effects of the holidays, winter blues and often, serious depression.

Here are some common reasons people seek therapy in January:
• The holidays are over and now the house feels empty. After loved ones leave the quiet may bring on feelings of despair and loneliness.
• If the family gatherings didn’t go as smoothly as you had hoped there may be residual feelings of anger and hurt that you have kept inside until now.
• Winter is here and you may be feeling cabin fever or Seasonal Depression.
• You may be grieving for the loss of a family member that wasn’t there for the festivities this year. More people die during the winter than any other season, which can cause the “happy” holiday season to feel lonely and sad.
• There are more suicides in January than any other month. Intense feelings of worthlessness, helplessness and depression are common this time of year.

Here are some things you can do to stave off the Winter Blues:

1. Get as much sunshine as possible. Bundle up and go sit out on your porch for 20 minutes a day, or go for a short walk and let the sun’s natural healing powers work its magic. Sit in front of a large window and read while the sun shines in.
2. Protect you and your family from Aunt Suzy’s alcoholic binges and Uncle Joe’s outspoken rudeness by making plans for the next holiday season. Perhaps rent a condo in the hills for just you and your kids to enjoy for the week. The rest of the family will get along fine without you and you will protect yourself and your kids from abuse and unpleasantness.
3. Grieve your lost loved ones in your own way. Go visit the burial site or listen to music that brings back happy memories – just let yourself release the grief.
4. Get out of the house as often as possible. If your health or the weather is so bad that you cannot drive off to the mall, then ask friends to have their get togethers with you at your house.
5. Be creative. Refuse to be the “poor little victim.” Instead, take charge of your life and live it the best you can every day. Smile; even when you don’t feel like it!
6. Seek help. Don’t keep feelings of despair to yourself. Remember, all feelings eventually change. The depression you feel today may be gone by tomorrow. Never make a permanent decision to solve a temporary problem.

Dreaming - Does Everyone Do It??

2007-01-03T01:27:00.000-08:00

Dreaming Fast Facts

1. 5%-10% of adults have nightmares at least once a month
2. Sometimes people who become blind after birth can see in their dreams
3. Only about 0.01% of dreams include a celebrity
4. Babies and animals dream
5. 83% of boys dreams include aggressive behavior
6. 50% of girls dreams include aggressive behavior
7. 55% of men's dreams include aggressive behavior
8. 34% of woman's dreams include aggressive behavior
9. Women are more likely to have dreams that take place at home or at work
10. Men are more likely to have dreams that take place outdoors
11. Everyone dreams
12. It is possible to train yourself to remember your dreams
13. Women have more nightmares than men

Does everyone Dream?

Everyone dreams. However, not everyone remembers their dreams. We typically begin dreaming about an hour after falling asleep; and we continue to dream about every 90 minutes throughout the night. If we wake up in the night the cycle starts all over again.

There are many ways to develop the ability to remember your dreams. One way is to meditate about your desire to remember your dreams just before going to bed. Tell yourself that you will remember a dream tonight. Do this every night for a week. Once you begin to have "flashes" or in other ways begin to remember dreaming, write down what you remember, what you feel and what the dream reminds you of. If you awake in the night, quickly jot down a few key words about what you remember on a notebook kept beside your bed. This will help you to jog your memory when you wake in the morning. Whenever possible write down everything you remember about all your dreams. Keeping a dream journal can be very enlightening for those who want to use their dreams to help them in their waking like. Going over your dreams for the last week or two can help you realize themes that may be mirrored in your life - things that may need your attention, or new understandings that you need to become aware of.

When we dream our body is most often in a state of semi-paralization. This keeps us from acting out our dreams. There are some types of sleep disorders in which the dreamer acts out all or part of their dream either by swinging their arms, kicking or even sleep walking. These conditions are fairly rare. While we dream our eyelids flutter as our eyes move rapidly back and fourth. This is referred to as REM or Rapid Eye Movement sleep.

Holiday Sleep Changes Effect Your Mental Health

2006-12-26T19:28:00.000-08:00

Holiday stress can contribute to insomnia affecting both physical and mental health.

“The holidays throw off sleep patterns,” says Jose Loredo, M.D. “Because of parties, gift shopping, eating more and drinking more, people tend to go to bed later this time of year, but still get up early. That can lead to sleep deprivation.”

Sonia Ancoli-Israel, Ph.D. Professor of Psychiatry at UCSD School of Medicine says that it may take several nights of good sleep to make up for one sleep-deprived night. “The more nights you skimp on sleep, the longer it will take you to catch up,” she says. “Remember that sleep is just as important as food and water. You need all three of them to be healthy.”

Loredo states that people often seek help for sleeping problems after the holidays when they realize that what they thought was a short-term problem is still with them. He has noticed that the higher an individual’s stress load during the holidays, the more likely a person is going to have trouble getting a good night’s rest. The trouble begins, he says, when people can’t turn off their thoughts because they have a lot on their minds. This can lead to temporary insomnia. If the insomnia goes beyond a couple of weeks, he advises seeing a sleep specialist for medical or behavioral intervention.

But before taking that step try these tips for getting a good night’s sleep:

• If you’re experiencing insomnia, don’t.dwell on it. It will likely pass when you resume your regular schedule. But if you make a big deal out of it, the anxiety caused by thinking you have insomnia can actually lead to permanent insomnia.

• Exercise helps promote good sleep. If you like to exercise vigorously, do it in the morning or early afternoon. A relaxing exercise such as yoga can be done right before bed.

• Reserve the bed for sleeping. Don’t eat, work or watch TV in bed. Teach your body that when you hit the sack, it is because you’re ready for some shut-eye.

• Stick with a consistent sleeping schedule. If you get thrown off one night because of a party, that’s fine. Make sure you resume your normal bedtime the next night.

• Avoid stimulants such as caffeine, nicotine, and alcohol close to bedtime. While alcohol often speeds the onset of sleep, it disrupts sleep in the night as the body begins to metabolize the alcohol, causing wakefulness. If you do drink alcohol, allow one hour before bedtime to metabolize each alcoholic drink.

• Do not eat a large meal right before going to bed. Allow time for food to digest before bedtime to avoid problems like heartburn or acid reflux. On the other hand, don’t go to bed hungry either. If you are hungry eat something easy on your digestion, like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich or a banana.

• If you can’t seem to turn off your thoughts, forget about counting sheep. That’s too much work and may actually keep you awake. Instead, count your breaths. As you breathe deeply, consciously relax each muscle, one at a time. Meditation allows your thoughts to float away as you feel your physical body relaxing.

• If counting breaths does not work, set aside a “worry time” earlier in the day. Find 15 minutes every day when you can turn off your cell phone, sit quietly and worry. That takes the pressure off thinking about issues later when you’re in bed.

• Stop all activities one hour before going to bed. Turn off the TV or computer – they’re stimulants. Take a shower, brush your teeth and get ready for bed. Loredo says reading in bed is okay as long as it is a book you can put down and isn’t frightening – otherwise, like TV, a scary book can stimulate your mind and keep you awake.

• If you wake up in the middle of the night tossing and turning about all the things you need to do the next day, get out of bed and write a list. Somehow, organizing all your anxieties on a single page seems to allow you to put these worries aside…at least until morning.

• Make sure your sleeping environment is relaxing and a pleasant place to rest. If that means buying a set of flannel sheets, a better pillow, a new blanket to keep you warm or black-out curtains, do it. Nothing is more important than getting a good night’s sleep.

Source: University of California, San Diego

What You Need to Know About Anorexia & Bulimia

2006-12-20T01:15:00.000-08:00

About Anorexia

Anorexia Nervosa is self-starvation. The individual is terrified of gaining weight or maintaining a normal weight. They have a distorted perception of their shape or size, and they may become amenorrheic. An individual with these symptoms can be classified as "clinically anorectic" when they are 15-20% less than normal weight. They are generally in denial about their physical condition, and are often times confused about the realities of their situation. Some (although few) anorexics are "restrictive anorexics," meaning that they loose weight by restricting their intake and doing excessive exercise. Most however, are secretly, binge purgers. They may purge by vomiting and/or by using diuretics or laxatives at least once per week.

Often the individual has a family history of either alcoholism or depression. They may have a tendency towards perfectionism and low self-esteem. At the onset of the disorder they may be suffering intense emotional pain stemming from either family relationships or social pressures. They may feel an inability to deal effectively with their environment and may feel helpless to take charge of their life. The individual who has exhibited symptoms for some time may be in denial about the accurate size of their body, and may compulsively compare themselves to others. The anorexic tends to take pride in their weight loss, gaining a temporary sense of accomplishment and self empowerment by succeeding at losing another pound.

The anorexic may verbally claim to want to gain weight, but secretly, may feel arrogant or proud about their low weight level. Likewise, the anorexic may gain pleasure, or a feeling of being special, by appearing to live without food. It's almost as if they need to show the world how "super human" they are. On the other hand, they inwardly feel "fake." Most secretly crave food. Most binge and purge when their desire for food becomes unbearable. Most anorexics will deny they crave food or binge. To admit this is to admit their failure. They feel ashamed of their behaviors, which increases their stress level - intensifying the symptoms.

Bulimia

Bulimia Nervosa is characterized by frequent binge eating. Binge eating is consuming an amount of food that is considerably larger than an average meal. The binger generally feels out of control regarding the amount of food eaten.

Most frequently, the binger follows the eating-episode with some form of purging such as vomiting and/or the use of laxatives or diuretics. The typical bulimic may exercise in an attempt to counteract the calories consumed but not purged, and/or, may fast for a given period of time afterwards. Although many bulimics are weekend bingers, most binge at least twice per week. As with Anorexia Nervosa, the bulimic's self image is generally distorted and they focus much of their attention on body size and shape. Although some are very thin, many are of normal or even above normal weight.

Bulimic's are usually very ashamed of their strange eating patterns and can become very secretive about it. Some are closet eaters. This is when they arrange their binges in places and at times when they are sure they will not be discovered. This often results in bedroom bingeing, closet bingeing, or bingeing when alone. If left uninterrupted, the bulimic may eat frantically until their body cannot tolerate another bite. The bulimic may then find the will to stop eating, long enough to purge. It is not uncommon for them to resume bingeing once the purge is complete. This may occur throughout the day until the binger is exhausted.

Some may eat more or less fervently depending on the most recent stresses experienced. As bulimics often binge as a way to avoid feelings associated with stress, the binge patterns may ebb and tide accordingly. Specific instances have been documented in which the bulimic binged beyond her stomach's ability to hold the food. Consequently she suffered a ruptured stomach cavity. Some have died from a binge and many have died from serious electrolyte imbalance and/or blood sugar fluctuations.

Bulimics may suffer loss of teeth due to continual bath of stomach acids flowing out of their mouth, eroding the enamel. Their intestines can become crippled with holes created by laxative abuse. Liver damage, kidney damage and heart damage is not uncommon. Even if the bulimic is eventually treated and pulls out of the disorder, s/he may be left with serious physical impairments that can result in serious medical problems later in life.

See more at http://www.psych-net.com

No Need To Suffer Anymore

2006-12-13T18:09:00.000-08:00

Once again I'm choosing to focus this blog on depression. This time of year people experience depression as often as the common cold, but for the most part, the common cold won't kill you, depression can.

I'm often left feeling dismay when someone tells me that they suspect that they are experiencing depression but they refuse to get help for it. How is it that in our high-tech, intellectually enlightened era people are still afraid to seek medical help for an all too common problem? The most common excuse I hear is "I keep telling myself that if I just make myself feel happy, I will get past it," Bull-Pucky! Let me fill you in on an apparently little known fact..."Depression is not equated with weakness! And you can’t pretend your way past it!" That is called denial.

Of course I understand that part of feeling depressed is feeling helpless and or worthless. Depression makes one feel like they don’t deserve to be helped. It is like the Devil’s advocate whispering in your ear, continually telling you that it is your fault that you are feeling this way; that you are just too flawed to be happy; and that going to a Dr. is admitting defeat. But giving into that defeatist voice in your head is allowing the depression to win.

Depression is a medical condition of the body - specifically, the brain. Every year people get the common cold, and every year they go to the drug store and get cold medication to help relieve it. They may even anticipate getting a cold and stock up on vitamin C, Echinacea and Zinc to help prevent themselves from getting sick. How is it any different with Depression?

Every winter 25% of the population experiences some degree of depression. But instead of trying to prevent it from taking over, or getting it under control once it hits, otherwise intelligent people make a choice to spend their winter months suffering. They allow their ill body to be in control of their life and the daily decisions they make. They begin to suffer with anxiety about everything and everyone around them and instead of doing something to solve the problem, they change their life to accommodate their pain. They stop engaging in exciting activities "because something bad might happen." Or they stay indoors because they just can't get the energy to do anything else. How is that living? It isn't, it's hiding.

The fact is you are human, and as a human you aren’t any more capable of curing yourself of a clinical depression than you are of turning off a nasty cold. Yes, there are things one can do to help alleviate mild symptoms of depression or despair, but when you get to the point that you are making decisions to accommodate your fears and lack of motivation, you are no longer experiencing a mild form of the illness you are clinically depressed, and you don’t deserve to suffer.

According to a Virginia Commonwealth University study in the Journal of Clinical Psychiatry "patients with recurrent depression could benefit from long-term maintenance with anti-depressant medication."

There are so many things that the world has been provided with to help ease the suffering that depression can bring. Why make the choice to continue suffering? Take advantage of the wonderful benefits that modern science has to offer and be grateful that you live in a world where treatment is available. OK, asking you to be grateful while you are still depressed is asking too much, but after getting some help you will be.

Interesting Facts About Mental Illness

2006-12-05T02:40:00.000-08:00

The measure of ones mental health is directly proportional to one's ability to delay gratification. Less mature adults insists on getting what they want when they want it - much like a little child.

Those who worry that they may be "crazy" most generally are not. "Crazy" people believe that they are just fine the way they are. On the other hand, mentally unstable people think that it is everything & everyone around them that needs to change. This is called having a "character disorder."

Neurotics believe that everything is their fault. People with a character disorder believe that every thing is everyone else's fault.

Having angry thoughts is not a measure of mental illness, it is what you do with that anger that determines who you really are. Only 10% of people diagnosed with schizophrenia become violent.

Not everyone is able to use therapy to improve their life. Some people, no matter how much help they are given, reject new input and habitually continue to use old ways that continue to produce old results. They see the world around them as the problem and so they are not willing to change themselves or the way they interact with that world. Sociopaths cannot be helped by traditional therapy. Only those who are capable of truly feeling empathy and grief can benefit from therapy.

The mentally ill often look toward quick easy fixes instead of going through the work it would take to heal their pained heart. Unfortunately, the quick fixes more often than not, give only temporary relief and make matters worse in the long run.

Anyone can undergo so much stress in their life that they develop the ability to "snap"; they may even have a temporary slip into psychosis, However this should not mean that crimes committed while under great emotional stress should be tolerated or go unpunished. Being "out of control" of your mind or "out of your mind" should not equate to getting a "get out of jail Free", card.

If you think you are seriously mentally ill, you probably are not. However if you suspect that you could benefit from therapy, you probably could.

10% of all mentally ill were "normal" prior to birth, but were damaged to some degree during the birth process.

10% of mentally retarded children were normal at birth but suffered head trauma at the hands of a care giver causing them to become mentally challenged.
Shaken Baby Syndrome is the most common cause of non-genetic mental retardation.

Anti Anxiety Diet

2006-11-30T01:17:00.000-08:00

Does the deadline seem more manageable when you're armed with a bag of cookies? It's true that food soothes. But when life's stresses add up to an anxiety attack, you don't need the food that you eat to make you more even anxious.

Thinking about the foods you consume can be difficult during the holiday season, but for those who tend to suffer with the added stress that comes this time of year, eating right may be essential to your survival.

Most of us understand that eating healthy foods and keeping your snacking to a minimum is important, but studies have shown that panic attacks and general anxiety can be greatly reduced if you take care to eat right. Here's how the Anti-Anxiety Diet can help you choose the right foods to stay calm -- even when you're faced with stressful situations:

1. Complex carbs act as tranquilizers by increasing your amount of serotonin, the neurotransmitter that calms, in your brain. This includes lots of fruits and whole-wheat foods to increase your complex carb intake.
2. Tryptophan -- a precursor to seratonin -- has a calming effect on the body. This includes turkey and milk choices, both of which contain tryptophan.
3. Caffeine can make you jittery and anxious. substitute a cup of calming herbal tea, such as St. John's Wort or chamomile, for your morning pick-me-up.
4. Chronic dehydration -- however slight -- can cause feelings of anxiety. That's why your diet must include plenty of water, often with some lemon or lime added to liven it up.
5. Frequent, small meals can help keep blood-sugar levels even. Eat a variety of healthy snacks to reduce the jitters that can accompany low blood sugar.

Healthy Dos and Don'ts

Do:
Take a multivitamin supplement that includes B and B6. Even undetectable malnutrition can lead to feelings of anxiety

Exercise daily. The endorphins produced make you feel relaxed, plus exercise reduces muscle tension and blood pressure

Drink plenty of water or other fluids like herb tea

Don't:
consume alcohol. Sure, a glass of wine before a big date takes the edge off, but the calming effect of alcohol is short-lived. Once it has worn off, there is a likelihood that your level of anxiety will actually increase

Eat every treat presented to you. It is OK to say “no thanks” even to mom.

A Time of Joy a Time of Grief

2006-11-22T00:33:00.000-08:00

For those who have lost a loved one, the holidays –a time of joy and thanksgiving–can be a painful reminder that the loved one is gone. While the sad feelings are normal, coping strategies can help people manage their feelings and enjoy the holiday season.“Traditionally, it is a time of family, friends and laughter, but for people who are in the grieving process, the holidays can enhance feelings of personal grief and separate us from what used to make us happy,” says Cynthia Bozich-Keith, a clinical assistant professor in Purdue University’s School of Nursing.

She says that although every person’s grief is individual, there are several things a grieving person can do to get through the season.

She offers the following suggestions:

Be sure to eat a nutritious diet, exercise, get adequate sleep and avoid alcohol.

Talk about your feelings with people you love and who love you. Allow yourself the right to talk about the person who died. The process of sharing memories may help with the healing process.

Set limits. Be realistic about the difference between what you want to do and what you can do vs. what you should do. “The shoulds will get you every time,” Bozich-Keith says. “It’s important to let go of the need to be perfect or doing it all. If you’re used to doing all of the shopping, cooking and decorating around the holidays, perhaps this is the year to share those things with others.”

Don’t feel guilty if you find yourself enjoying yourself around the holidays. “It is not disrespectful to the memory of your loved one if you have a good time,” she says. “Your loved one would be happy to know you are enjoying yourself.”

Embrace your memories and find comfort in them. “This is the bittersweet part,” she says. “Our memories often bring us to both tears and laughter, but they are what sustain us through the years.”

Celebrate life. Attend a holiday or religious service if faith is part of your life. Some people find comfort in acts of remembrance such as donating a poinsettia in memory of a loved one at church or making a donation in their name to a charity. Also, recognize that it is acceptable to create new traditions.

Bozich-Keith says it is important to keep in mind that sadness is normal during the holidays, no matter how long ago the loss took place.

“Try to ride the wave of emotions and accept that feelings of sadness and pain are unavoidable and are heightened during certain times,” she says. “The intense feelings will pass, but grief is an ongoing process. Don’t ever expect closure. It gets easier with time, but there will always be an empty space at the table.”

Source: Purdue University

Spirituality can Improve Your Mental Health

2006-11-15T03:54:00.000-08:00

Here it is, nearly Thanksgiving already. This is a time of year that can bring on a roller coaster of feelings and moods. We have discussed in previous issues how to take care of yourself during the holidays, how to stay the winter blues and how to prevent yourself from falling into depression. But one thing that isn't much written about during the holidays is the increase of spirituality in the people around you.

Even those who don't attend church or Synagogue much during the year feel a heightened sense of spirituality during the holidays. People can be more understanding of one another, more thoughtful and generally more generous. So how, if at all, does this temporary shift in community spirituality effect those who suffer with depression or grief during this time of year?
Well a Study at the American Psychiatric Association reported: "Depressed seniors who believe their life is guided by a larger spiritual force have significantly fewer symptoms of depression than those who do not use religious coping strategies."

This is a pretty remarkable study and when you see these kind of data coming out from both medical and psychiatric populations, it s hard to continue ignoring religion as a variable in the recovery from depression. "These results indicate that clinicians should encourage reconnection with religion as a way of coping in patients whose spirituality has been important to them," concluded Dr. Bosworth.

Most of us have heard about studies about the positive effects of prayer for hospitalized patience. And until recently, those studies have gone unrefuted. However last month a group of Atheists conducted a study from which they concluded that praying for patience did neither harm nor good.

But one thing that has been made very clear in the last 20 years, is that we are not just bodies with a brain. In order to find balance in our life we need to attend to our physical, mental and spiritual health. If we neglect one, the others will suffer.

So during this holiday season, take advantage of the heightened spiritual feel in the air. Take in a deep breath of goodwill and soak in that warm refreshing feeling of peace. You always have a choice, you can bah-humbug your way through, or you can determine to do everything possible to make your holiday season as good as it gets.

What is Mental Illness

2006-11-08T14:23:00.000-08:00

Often, after discovering what I do for a living, people will start telling me about someone they know who has a mental illness. They use terms they have heard on Oprah and they describe their subject with emotional disdain. After a question or two they admit to me that the person they are describing hasn't actually been diagnosed by a professional. In fact the accuser was using pop-psychology as a way to express their unhappy feelings for someone who had burned them.

So, what constitutes an actual mental illness and how can the lay person know if someone they are close to is in actual need of professional help?

Although there are hundreds of different types of mental illness, it can be impossible for the lay person to make a determination between simple neurotic behavior and an actual mental illness. However there are some tell-tale signs that can help you decide if you or your loved one needs professional help. Here are a few questions you can ask:

Is the person in question verbalizing thoughts of suicide, not wanting to deal with life anymore, or believing that other's would be better off without them? Talk of not wanting to live, even if veiled in humor, should never be minimized. Get immediate professional help.
Do the symptoms the person is displaying preventing them from functioning normally in their everyday life, i.e. not able to attend school,or work, no longer able to keep up with physical hygiene necessities, unable to interact socially as s/he had previously.
Does the person in question display little or no empathy for others (all others, not just the scorned)? Often those with serious personality disorders have a grave inability to feel for others. Even if they marry and have children they are unable to experience deep emotional connections with others including pets.
Can the person decide when to be in control and when to loose control? For instance a violent abuser may be abusive at home but able to control him/herself at work. If they are not able to control themselves in certain situations they may may be dealing with a mental illness. But those who can function with friends, at work or in other situations but loose control with certain people or in certain situations like at home or in the car generally have an anger management problem but not a mental illness.

Diagnosing a mental illness is a complex process. Although someone may be acting erratically, defiantly or to your dislike, they may not have an actual mental illness. Don't be to quick to label someone a "borderline" or a "narcissist" without a full understanding of what those labels mean.

Bio-Feedback Breathing Techniques For Stress & Panic Attacks

2006-11-03T03:23:00.000-08:00

Breathing exercises and physical exercise are important for reducing stress. Practicing a deep breathing exercise can be calming and energizing and can even help with stress-related health problems such as panic attacks or digestive disorders.

The following is an excelent breathing exercise for stress reduction:

* Sit up, with your back straight or lie flat on a padded floor.
* Place your tongue against the roof of your mouth just behind your upper front teeth and keep it there throughout the exercise.
* Exhale completely, and slowly, through your mouth, making a whoosh sound
* Close your mouth and inhale quietly through your nose, to a count of four. * Hold your breath for a count of seven.
* Exhale completely through your mouth, making a whoosh sound, to a count of eight.

Repeat this cycle three more times for a total of four breaths. Try to do this breathing exercise at least twice a day. You can repeat the whole sequence as often as you wish, but don't do more than four breaths at one time for the first week. You can build up as your body becomes accustom to the new technique. This will help keep you from hyperventilating as you begin to practice the technique.

This exercise is fairly intense and has a profound effect on the nervous system -- remember, with this exercise, more is not better). This exercise is the best and easiest tool I know for stress management.

Time management is one of the best ways to decrease daily stress. If you can manage your time properly, you will eliminate the stress of worrying about being late or becoming stressed in traffic. You will make fewer mistakes because you will not be in a rush to finish a project.

Attitude is a choice; and a positive attitude is a habit that anyone can achieve. But like any positive change it requires acknowledging that one's attitude needs changing. After recognizing the problem, you can begin to change the way you think about difficult life situations and begin to change the way you handle life in general. And like any life change, it isn't likely to happen overnight just because you wished it so.

It will take time and a determined effort to stop in the middle of your negative thinking and begin to think positively. It will feel strange and even fake. But that is because you aren't used to thinking that way. If you give it a tenacious effort, positive thinking will become your new habit and will no longer feel strange at all.

Children And Depression Symptoms

2006-10-23T23:21:00.000-07:00

Children who can accurately assess how their classmates feel about them - even if those feelings are negative - are less likely to show symptoms of depression, according to Florida State University researchers.

Psychology Professor Janet Kistner found that children in third through fifth grades who had the wrong idea about their level of social acceptance were more likely to develop symptoms of depression over time. The study, "Bias and Accuracy of Children's Perceptions of Peer Acceptance: Prospective Associations with Depressive Symptoms," was published in the Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology. Graduate students Corinne David-Ferdon and Karla Repper and psychology Professor Thomas Joiner were co-authors.

"There's a long-running debate in the field of psychology about whether realistic perceptions are a hallmark of positive adjustment or they are associated with risk for depression," Kistner said. "Our results support the perspective that realistic perceptions are a hallmark of mental health."

The findings are significant because they show that accuracy is the key - not whether children thought that other kids liked them or not. That's important because some psychologists have theorized that people who have a positive bias - meaning they think others like them more than they actually do - are protected against developing symptoms of depression, while those who have a negative bias are prone to maladjustment and depression. The researchers found neither to be true.

Instead, they found that those who had symptoms of depression at the start of the study over time became less accurate and more negatively biased about how well they were liked, indicating that negative bias is more of a consequence than a cause of depressive symptoms. The researchers are the first to look at both bias and accuracy, and the findings underscore the importance of studying both facets of perceptual errors, Kistner said.

"Little attention has been given to the role that inaccurate self-perceptions may play in children's risk for depression," she said. "Our results suggest a possible self-perpetuating cycle in which inaccurate perceptions lead to elevated depressive symptoms and depressive symptoms lead to decreased accuracy of perceived peer acceptance."

The findings are consistent with psychological theories that attempt to explain social competence and general adjustment, according to Kistner. Self-verification theory suggests that people are motivated to maintain their self-perceptions, even if they are negative. Even positive feedback can cause distress if it threatens their view of themselves. Social competence theories center on the idea that children who accurately perceive how others feel about them are better able to modulate their behaviors in ways that maximize acceptance. Greater social acceptance, in turn, is expected to be associated with fewer symptoms of depression.

In Kistner's study, 667 children were given class rosters at the beginning of the school year and asked how much they liked their classmates on a scale of one to five and to predict the acceptance ratings they would receive from each of their classmates. Their predicted ratings were compared to the actual ratings they received to measure perceptual accuracy. The children also were asked to complete a questionnaire about whether they had experienced symptoms of depression, including feeling sad, trouble concentrating and sleeping problems. The experiment was repeated six months later.

The average age of the children at the start of the study was 9.4 years old. Prior to about age 8, children's self-perceptions tend to be glowingly positive and unrealistic, according to Kistner. As children's cognitive abilities develop and they begin to rely on social comparisons to evaluate themselves, their exuberance gives way to more realistic - and sometimes negative - self-perceptions.

"This is an important age group to study because there is growing evidence of increased prevalence of depression in adolescence as well as a decrease in the age of first onset of depression," Kistner said. "We need to identify children in the late elementary school grades who are at risk for depression and to increase our understanding of the factors that contribute to the development of depression."

You can Beat the Winter Blues

2006-10-20T04:43:00.000-07:00

Each year millions of people suffer with Seasonal Affective Disorder, Holiday Blues and depression. By following these 5 steps you can avoid Winter blues.

1) Eat a Balanced Diet
Research has indicated that diet can play an important role in alleviating depression. The most basic principle in preventing depression and mood swings, is to eat a balanced diet that contains foods from all the different food groups - fruit and vegetables, unprocessed grains and cereals, lean meat, fish, eggs, milk and dairy products, legumes and nuts, poly- or monounsaturated margarine and oils.

If you are on a low-carbohydrate diet then the chances are good that you are not getting enough B vitamins. The vitamins that make up the B complex influence practically every metabolic process in the human body and there are indications that a B complex deficiency can exacerbate depression.

Researchers have, for example, found that elderly people who eat only refined starches (for a variety of reasons, such as difficulty with chewing), develop vitamin B deficiencies and are prone to depression. When elderly subjects were given vitamin B supplements, their mental performance improved and they were less likely to suffer from depression.

2) Essential fatty acids
Researchers have found that people who have an omega-3 deficiency are more prone to depression than those who consumed adequate quantities (usually in the form of fish). Foods are rich in omega-3:

all types of fish and seafood, but particularly fatty fish such as salmon, and snoek
fish oils (tuna, cod liver and salmon oils)
plant oils (flaxseed, canola, walnut, soy oils)
foods fortified with omega-3 (eggs, milk and bread - check in your supermarket)
Salmon oil supplements

3) Cut out stimulants
Certain stimulants such as caffeine give you a quick lift, but in the long run they can harm your nervous system. So while most people can have their three or four cups of coffee a day, if you suffer from depression it may be a good idea to cut out coffee, caffeine-containing beverages (colas and those new energy drinks that are spiked with caffeine) and diet pills that contain caffeine.

4) Exercise to beat the winter blues
The moment winter arrives, many people who are relatively active during the summer months, suddenly stop all their activity and huddle indoors all day. This is a surefire way of getting depressed. When we exercise we make chemicals called endorphins in our bodies that boost our moods and combat depression.

Yes, it is colder and darker, but if you do some planning and make a concerted effort, then you can still exercise in the winter. Put on a jacket and a muffler and go for a brisk walk. Use your indoor exercise equipment, treadmill, and exercise ball. Use the radio to energize you and get moving with housework or simply dancing in the family room. Do a workout using an exercise video. With just 20 minutes of exercise a day you can make a huge difference in your mental state.

5) Get 20 minutes of sunshine every day

Once again research has shown that getting enough sun during the winter months can play an enormous role in balancing your moods. Even if it is a cloudy day you can get enough sunshine by sitting in front of a picture window and read a good book. Get outside as often as possible. Be creative and you will see a dramatic difference.

If you combine a balanced diet with regular exercise throughout the year, you will beat those winter blues. Often the solutions to good health and mental wellness are so simple, that we tend to overlook them, but you can take charge of your depression this winter if you make a few changes to your diet and increase your level of physical activity.

Coming This week - Therapy in a blog

2006-10-19T06:34:00.001-07:00

This blog will deal with all kinds of mental health issues including eating disorders, depression, personality disorders, suicide, domestic violence, all kinds of abuse and much more. If you want me to blog on a particular topic. Leave a comment and let me know what your interests are. Read and enjoy.

Take care,
Karen